Maiden Voyage

Prodigal Living, Self-Indulgence and Self-Gratification

2011-08-03T10:51:00.000+03:00

This verse broke my heart when I read it this morning: James 5:5

"Here on earth you have abandoned yourselves to soft (prodigal) living and to the pleasures of self-indulgence and self-gratification. You have fattened your hearts in a day of slaughter"

You may not be drinking, smoking, prostituting or doing any of those things that we as Christians consider "carnal" but there are other things we do. As Christians, we are to be ever conscious of the God we serve. To be wholly submitted to him and to walk only in his ways for us. How many times has God told you to do a certain thing, but instead you chose to take a different route. In your mind you are not sinning. You are just making the decision that YOU think is best, but if it is not God's decision for you it is sin.

He says that we have taken the way of self-indulgence and self-gratification. It is what I want. What feels good to me. We forget that God has our lives all mapped out according Psalm 139. The days of our lives were planned out by him before any one of them ever came to be. We have been sent here on earth with a mission to accomplish, but we have turned away from that mission and purpose and have created missions and purposes for ourselves outside of God's will. Sadly, we still profess to know him and to walk in his ways. We have deceived ourselves!!

One thing have I desired of the Lord and that will I seek after, that I may know Him as I am known by Him. That I may find out and do the works which God predestined or planned beforehand for me to do. Taking paths which He prepared ahead of time that I should walk in them (Eph 2:10).

It's a Love Triangle

2011-07-22T08:14:00.000+03:00

A love triangle is often looked on as a bad thing but God has his own love triangle that he made for each one of us to enjoy. If you are missing out on one aspect of this love triangle you will always feel unsatisfied, with an emptiness that does not go away. However, God has made this triangle open for all. We just have to walk up and have our fill.

What I'm I talking about? There are 3 kinds of love. Agape - God's kind of love that is unconditional, Philia - which is brotherly affection that we get from our friends, family and community and Eros - Romantic love. All 3 meet a different need in one's life. So if you have have friends who offer philia love and a husband who offers Ero's love, you will still have a deep desire for more love, in this case Agape. My own need is for Ero's. I have Agape, I have lots of philia but I am short on Ero's. Because of that, I have a need for love that I cannot get from God or my friends. Some people may look at me and say that God's love covers all my need for love but that is not true. God cannot love me romantically. He cannot not hug on me, kiss on me or be intimate with me sexually like a mate would. The thing to realize is that God purposefully made us that way.

I was talking to God about this emptiness I have that I couldn't at the time put a finger to and he led me to analyze some issues from my past. I realized that where Ero's love is concerned I had become like Lazarus the poor man who longed for the crumbs that fell from the rich man's table. The crumbs were all he ever got. He never sat at the table and ate his own portion. God has laid out buffet tables of love. Here I was, looking longingly at the Ero's table and only wishing for crumbs, because for some misguided reason I did not think I was good enough to sit at the table and have my fill of Ero's within God's plan and purpose for me. What a shame!!!

There is a buffet table fully loaded with Agape love for you to enjoy. Another table has all kinds of philia love just for you to have your fill. The Ero's table is also heavy laden with all kinds of goodies. Why sit here until you die?!! Walk up to the table you have not enjoyed, sit down and claim your portion. It's there for the taking!!

I am reminded of the story of the man who prepared a feast and sent his servants to go out and invite the guests for whom the feast was prepared. The guests all had an excuse for why they could not come to the feast. When the report came back to the man that none of his invited guests were coming to the party, for each had an excuse, he determined that his food would not go to waste. So he sent out his servants to the highways and the bi-ways to bring in others who were not previously invited to come and enjoy the feast.

None shall take my place at any of the love banqueting tables. I will take my portion and enjoy it with relish! So, square your shoulders, take a deep breath and march purposefully to the love table you have been missing out on. Take your place at the table, it was prepared for you before time begun. Eat and drink without cost, for Jesus paid the price at Calvary and don't let the devil or anyone else for that matter, hold you back.

That Devil Lied!!!

2011-07-17T07:16:00.000+03:00

We are told that the devil is a liar and the father of all lies. So much so, that when he lies he only speaks his native tongue. No truth can be found in him at any one time. Hence the reason why we should never allow him to speak to us.

So I'm chilling by myself yesterday pondering my fast approaching birthday (I will turn 35) and considering all the things that I wanted to have achieved by now. I have achieved much and I am on track with everything else except the marriage and kids thing. Suddenly, from nowhere, I get hit by a feeling of despondency and despair and the devil begins to speak. It took me a second to realize it was him speaking so I gave him ear for a minute.

I start thinking that marriage will never happen. Here I am waiting for God to hook things up in his time and the question pops into my mind, "what time?" If I am turning 35 and he has not done it, which other time is there? Then another thought pops into my head "How about adopting kids and moving on with your life?" I'm like "Yeah!! I could do that!" then God, the voice of reason and peace breaks through all the demonic noise and says "Listen to your inner self. Is that what you really want to do?"

So I close out all the noise and get quiet and just listen to my inner self. The answer comes to me clear as crystal. I don't want kids without a husband. I want the security of marriage in which to raise my godly offspring according to Malachi 3. What a relief to have all the crazy thoughts expelled and to know exactly what I want.

Someone may ask, "Isn't it time to give up the notion and start working on plan B?" I have! Plan B, C, D...Z are all the same and they are spelled out very clearly in Psalm 46:10 in God's own words: "Be still and know that I am God..." I will be still and I will let God be God in my life. Hallelujah! What peace!! What joy!! I don't have to worry about a thing. My God is working it all out for me!!

...Limbo...

2011-07-11T23:51:00.000+03:00

I think I'm going through a phase. I'm not sure what phase, but a phase. I am restless about life and feel like I need to make a change... but what change should I make? I have no motivation to do anything. Work feels like a bother and my personal ambition has taken a nose dive. That shocks even me. I wake up in the morning feeling great only to feel like going back to bed after 2 hours. What is this? I am not at all depressed or anything like that. I'm just in limbo...I HATE LIMBO!!

I am praying that God will show me what needs to change and that I will have the courage to change it. One thing's for sure, I am still excited about life and I know that the best is yet to come...just as soon as I get out of limbo.

Tongue's of Fire!

2011-06-23T11:48:00.000+03:00

What is it about the Holy Spirit and the Tongue? Why is it that he takes over your speech when he comes in making tongues the immediate, visible indication of his infilling? Well, Proverbs 18:21 and James 3:1-12 explain things to us.

First of all, the power of life and death is in the tongue. You eat the fruit of your tongue in this life. Secondly, James goes into a whole discourse on the tongue. He says that the tongue is on fire. Before we are redeemed, our tongue is lit on fire by hell. You have to understand this, the tongue is always on fire. The question is, which fire lights up your tongue?

The description of the unredeemed tongue given by James in vs 6-8 is as follows:

a) It is a world of wickedness

b) It contaminates and depraves the whole body

c) It is lit up by hell and then goes on to set your whole body on fire with the same hellish flame

d) It is a restless, undisciplined and irreconcilable evil.

e) It is full of deadly poison

That said, I couldn't help but notice that James compares the tongue to the radar of a ship. The radar sets the direction of the ship even against strong winds. In the same way, your tongue sets the direction of your life, regardless of what you face in life. That tells me that whatever force controls your tongue, controls and leads your life in the direction that it needs you to go. Another comparison made by James is that of a bit in a horses mouth. Using the bit, one is able to make the horse go wherever they want. The bit, controls the direction of the horse. In the same way, your tongue controls the direction of your life, whether this way or that. And the force controlling your tongue, is the force that is directing your life.

That said, the horror of having a tongue lit by the fires of hell is quite vivid. It means that hell or the devil, controls the direction your life takes. In this case, you are making your way to death at a steady and quick pace. It is therefore no wonder that when the Holy Spirit came on the day of Pentecost he manifested himself as tongues of fire and then went on to take control of the tongue by causing the 120 saints in the upper room to speak in tongues. In my own personal opinion, the fire of God touched them, setting their tongues aflame with the fire of heaven. They now had a new controlling force. The Holy Spirit of God, who could turn the bit or radar in the direction of heaven. Their lives were turned around so that now instead of walking towards death, they could walk towards life.

The call of Isaiah in Chapter 6 is very interesting to me. The moment he sees the vision of the Lord he realizes what a mess he is. He is immediately concerned with his filth but specifically he draws attention to his speech. He says "...I have filthy lips, and I live among people with filthy lips..." He realizes that his tongue is off. Funny enough, the cure for his corrupt speech is a coal of fire from the altar of the Lord. Once his mouth is touched with that Holy fire he is not just cleansed from his filth, but his tongue, his control point, is lit with a new fire. God's own holy fire! Next he is commissioned with the following words "...go and say to this people..." Once the fire of God has touched his lips he can now speak life giving words. (The correction of God, even when it seems harsh, is always life giving).

The reason the Holy Spirit takes over the tongue first, is to put out the strange fire from the enemies camp and light it with fire from God's Holy altar. With your tongue now lit with Holy fire, your life can fully be under the control of the Holy Ghost who can then lead you in the ways of the Lord and in the path of righteousness. What then can we say? Sweet Holy Spirit, I give you my tongue, my control point. Kill the strange fire of the enemy, and light my tongue with Holy fire from the altar of the Lord. Take my life and turn it this way and that so that I am walking the path of righteousness at all times. Thank you for redemption and for taking me over in Jesus Holy and Mighty name I pray, Amen!!

Holy Spirit: Fill Me Once More!

2011-06-22T11:26:00.000+03:00

As part of my back to the basics search of truth I was led to the Holy Spirit all over again. When I was first born again and Spirit filled the Holy Spirit was so real to me. He was my constant companion. He spoke to me and made me laugh out loud all by myself. He told me what to do and how to go about my life. He was closer and more real to me than a flesh and blood person. Somehow, I lost sight of him along the way and even though I knew he existed, he ceased to be as real as all that. I have never regained that initial relationship. Somehow, I know that is how things ought to be.

This morning I was brooding over the changes I need to make in my life and was looking keenly at areas in my life that could improve. Of the four major areas I listed, the last one was my relationship with the Holy Spirit. The moment I wrote that down, a light bulb went on inside me. I realized that if I could get that part sorted first, then the rest of it would fall into place. I immediately went on a study of the Holy Ghost to find out what God was trying to tell me. Here is what I found out:

a) First, The Holy Spirit is our Counselor, Helper, Intercessor, Advocate, Strengthener and Standby. We need him in order to accurately navigate the path of righteousness that God has set out for us as much as we need oxygen to live. Without him, we cannot make it.

b) When we are baptized in the Holy Ghost not only does he come into us, but he completely diffuses into our our whole being (Acts 2:4), spirit, soul (Rom 9:1) and body (1 Cor 6:19). So much so that we cease to be our own and we become fully his. Additionally, we are baptized into him, as in we are placed inside him and introduced into the person of the Holy Spirit. We become one with the Holy Spirit of God and therefore one with God. This is a profound mystery.

c) Once we are baptized in him and he is in us, he then takes us over. We are now full of the Holy Ghost, are led by him, take our instruction from him, directed and controlled by him. Our assignment comes from him. He is the one who calls us apart for the work that he has for us to accomplish here on earth (Acts 13:2-4). He also directs our speech.

I realized specifically that there seemed to be a direct link between the in-filling of the Holy Ghost and speech. First in the sign of speaking in tongues, which is a direct and immediate manifestation of the in-filling, and then in regular speech. In the book of Acts I found several statements that read as follows:

"...Peter, because he was filled and controlled by the Holy Spirit said..." Acts 4:8

The same was said of Paul who discerned by the Holy Spirit the intents of Elymas' heart and being filled and controlled by the Holy Spirit he spoke...

I began to meditate on that link between the Holy Spirit and the tongue. Why is it, that the first thing the Spirit of God seems to take over is the tongue? The study continues...

He Will Keep You From Falling In a Trap

2011-06-15T08:41:00.000+03:00

I have always been a cautious person. Especially in matters of the heart. It takes me a long time to allow myself to fully love someone. That has been my defense in many ways because I have not really ever been hurt by a guy. By the time we break up, I still haven't let myself love you like that. I have also never been the person who goes out and gets stinking drunk. Even when I use to put away the liqueur I would get just tipsy enough to be happy go lucky without being stupid.

Lately God has been encouraging me to be more daring or to let myself go a little and just love on people. This, especially if it is related to guys, makes me think "No Way." However, he said something that made me feel a lot better. God will never let one of his own be caught in the net of the wicked or fall into a pit that they have dug. Ours is to keep an eye on Jesus and follow the commands that he gives us. There is no need to be afraid of living life for fear of making mistakes. God will watch over you and make sure that you are safe.

Ps 121 is one of my favorite psalms. It says that God watches over me and he neither slumbers nor sleeps. He is a guard for my soul. Ps 139 says that he goes before me and comes behind me. He goes out before me to find a place for me to rest and still keeps a rear guard on me. He literally has my back. Do you know that in the time that Israel wandered in the desert the angel of the Lord would go before them to identify a place for them to pitch camp? He can do the same thing for you and if you are like me, you can trust him to guide your desires, choices and more.

The Virgin Monologues Part III

2011-06-10T00:00:00.002+03:00

Often I get this question: "What if you get married after waiting all this time only to find that your husband is a lousy lay?" Huh? How will I know the difference? I have no one to compare him to. The only reason you are able to tell if someone is a lousy lay is because you have someone to compare them to. Don't you see the wisdom of God in asking us to wait? My husband will never have to worry about being compared with any other man because he will be the only man. He never has to wonder if he is doing it better than the last guy.

Then there are those who insist that experience is necessary in order to have great sex in marriage. I beg to differ! This thing is not copy and paste! Just because Mary liked it a certain way does not mean I will. Come on People!! Let this be an adventure into uncharted waters. When the time comes, my hubby and I will be learning each other. He will be discovering what I like and I will be discovering what he likes. Its an adventure. A discovery of new sensations and feel good nerves. An explosion of pleasure. I want to savor that in marriage with my husband.

I have always said that on my part, it is not necessary for my husband to be a virgin. If he is, which would be the ideal situation, then that would be awesome! However, I know that God forgives sin and if the man he brings my way has repented and is forgiven, who I'm I to hold it against him? When I say that, I usually get this comment from Christians "You will have shortchanged yourself!" In their minds, if I have waited then I had better get someone who is waiting too. I don't think so. I think where God is concerned, mercy triumphs over judgment. I think that God in his wisdom pairs us up with the people we need in this life to fulfill his purposes. At least if your life is submitted to him. In that case, if he wishes to extend grace to a wonderful man, a sinner saved by grace, by giving him a virgin wife regardless of his past, so be it! I'm game!

The one thing you have to understand about me is that I am doing what God tells me to do. I am his. My life is submitted to him. I want what he wants and nothing more. He is an awesome God!!!

The Virgin Monologues: Part II

2011-06-09T12:00:00.003+03:00

Many people look at me and wonder what I gain by waiting to have sex when I get married verses gratifying the desires of my flesh. I can only say that the benefits of the wait are multiple and significant to me.

First, I know that it pleases God for me to stay sexually pure. My number one priority in life is to please God in all I do. This is the greatest benefit for me.
I do not have to go into a panic every time my period is late. There is nothing worse than the panic that sets in at the thought of being pregnant outside of marriage for most women. Why go through all that drama?
I do not have to worry about birth control and the hustle that comes with that. For some it's the pill they can never remember to take daily, for others it's the shot that made them balloon to twice their original size, for others it's convincing the guy to just put on the darn condom... what? Too much drama!
I do not have to worry about sexually transmitted diseases. What bliss!!
Then there is the emotional trauma of sleeping with a guy who you are in love with only to find out that his goal the whole time he was being so romantic and wonderful was to "hit it!" How now?
After going through the "love and dump" cycle several times, the bitterness sets in. Women get so jaded that they come to the conclusion that all men are lying, cheating dogs and there are no good men out there. Do I really want to become that woman? NO!
Before long she starts sleeping with men just to scratch the itch. Sex is brought down from God's ultimate expression of love and affection between a man and his wife to... nothing. This was not God's plan. He wanted sex to be enjoyed within marriage and held in honor.

These are just but a few of my reasons to wait and honestly, when I look at the world we are living in today I get more reasons everyday.

The Virgin Monologues: Part I

2011-06-08T12:00:00.000+03:00

Some time back a friend put up a very shocked facebook status about discovering that a certain friend of his was a virgin at something like 23 or 25 years of age. Well, I responded by telling him that virgins exist and that I was one of them. I expected shocked responses and some dissing but not outright hatefulness. One of his friends, a lady, came out fists swinging. Her comment was that all virgins are lonely, lousy, f***heads who basically can't get themselves laid. What?!!

One of the things I have to say about that is that anyone on this planet can get laid! Anyone! Don't you watch the news? You will see a woman who is stark, raving mad and she will be pregnant or have a baby on her back. How do you think it got in her belly? Sometimes it will be a mentally retarded girl and she will be just as pregnant as can be. She will have drool down her chin, she will be filthy, and pregnant. Some guy did that to her. How much more a perfectly healthy, beautiful woman? If you think virgin's just don't have someone to sleep with, you may need to think again.

As for loneliness, I have seen many women who are sleeping with men, sometimes multiple men, getting more sex than is necessary in one lifetime and they are still lonely. Married women will tell you that they may be sleeping with their husbands and yet are lonely. Why? Because one needs to connect on a deeply spiritual level with another person in order for that lonely feeling to disappear. Sex does not mean that you are connecting on a deeper level with a man or woman for that matter.

In truth, I am a very well adjusted single adult. In fact, unless I tell you that I have not slept with a man, you will not be able to tell. I am a choleric personality which means that I am a natural leader and achiever. I thrive on challenges and achievement. I am a go getter, very confident and great public speaker. Most people on the outside looking in can probably not imagine that I know nothing about what goes on between a man and a woman. At least not by experience. I say this to say that being a virgin does not necessarily mean that one is dysfunctional or ignorant. If anything it saves you the drama of heartache and pain that is caused by multiple couplings and break ups.

I think the lady that was so insulting of virgins was really bitter about her own state. Maybe she had regrets about not staying sexually pure. Her bitterness and anger showed at a very unlikely time to a person she did not even know. My only hope is that she can discover the God who restores things and makes them new again. Including virginity. By so doing she may discover the joy of secondary virginity. If you are in her shoes, you can too. It's a great place for self discovery. Try it! You just might like it.

Yes! I am almost 35, A Virgin and I Refuse to Compromise!!

2011-06-07T11:44:00.002+03:00

I think the question that cracks me up and irritates me the most, at the same time, is the question about my marital status. Everybody looks at me and wants to know why I am not married and now that I am officially in my mid thirties the question has become "When will you have kids?" I used to worry about those things and then I read in God's word that I should be anxious for nothing, but in all things I must let God know what I need and then let his peace guard my heart and mind (Philippians 4:6-7)

The statement that follows that question is usually "If you don't want a man (they assume men are a bother to me) you should just find one to impregnate you so you can at least have a child or two to raise on your own." I find that very interesting especially because it often comes from women who are born again. In their minds, I am allowed to put aside my salvation, marry an unbeliever and trust God to save him, or get pregnant if I find men a bother and don't want to live with one. Can you say messed up mentality???!!!

Many times I have been looked at as a fool for waiting on God well past the "acceptable waiting time." I will be 35 years old in 3 months, I am still a virgin and I still refuse to compromise my faith. How can I leave God, even for a moment, to go fend for myself on something as important as a life partner? I trust God to know what I need, when I need it. I trust him not to withhold any good thing from me in accordance with his word (Psalm 34:10, 84:11, 103:5). I trust him to build me a house just like he told David he would do for him in 2 Samuel 7:11b "...Furthermore, the Lord declares that He will make a house for you..." This same God shall make a house for me. He will settle me in my own home as a happy mother of children. I will indeed have a quiver full of them.

Psalm 127 is my portion indeed, for I have not waited on the Lord in vain.

¹Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.

²It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.

³Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.

⁴As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.

⁵Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

God will build me a house, he will give me a wonderful husband and together we will have the heritage and reward of a quiver full of children. I am His in waiting and looking forward to marriage and my own home!

Pass on a Godly Heritage!!

2011-06-06T10:57:00.000+03:00

Have you ever thought of the legacy you will leave the generations behind you? What inheritance will you pass on to your kids? I have always thought about this in regards to wealth but now I am seeing a spiritual inheritance as well. Children look at you to see how you are carrying yourself and then go ahead and inherit various things by absorption. Genetics is also something you can pass on including issues like depression, anxiety and more. But is this the legacy you want to leave your progeny? Whatever you do not overcome in your lifetime will be passed on to the generations behind you and they will have to fight it and overcome it if it is to be stopped.

Knowing that encourages me to change and become a better person if only for the sake of the next generation. I must come up higher, make better choices, flee temptation and cling to God. Decide to set a new standard for your progeny because every right choice you make will overturn a wrong pattern in your family tree and will ensure that your family lineage is better off.

Look at your family bloodline and identify some negative traits or trends that you would like to stop. For my family its alcoholism and in some instances hedonism. Its promiscuity which makes children out of wedlock common within the family. In some instances its hot tempers and language that can be abusive. Gossip can also be a challenge. So what do I have to do? I am determined that as far as my progeny is concerned I will overcome those things and when I pass on the baton it will contain sexual purity, slowness to anger, filled with the Holy Ghost vs drunk on alcohol, words and language that builds up and encourages, not language that tears down.

It is a spiritual battle, but God tells me how to overcome in Ephesians 6:10-18 and I know that once we are set free, we shall be free indeed. So think about the heritage you want to leave behind. Think about that thing that you struggle with and determine to overcome so that your generations will not have to struggle with it as well. Even if you are not married or have no children of your own, think about the many children who observe you all around. Determine to set an example for them and to pass on a godly heritage. You are blessed!!

Your Worth is Far Above Rubies!

2011-06-03T12:22:00.000+03:00

I have been learning some wonderful things on how to find the value in yourself. If you are like me, you have one area of your life that makes you feel lower than dirt. It could be that you don't have as much money as you would like, your past could be a bit dodgy, your skin color may be darker than you would like, or you may be heavier than most people consider appropriate. All these things can make you feel less valuable than you really are. So what is the true measure of your value as a person?

According to the devotional I read through today with Joel Osteen, the true measure of my value can be found in God. God found me so valuable that he sent his only begotten son to come and die so that he could have me. Hence Paul says "You were bought with a High Price" and that price is the blood and death of God's son Jesus. That said, my value is defined by that act of self sacrifice and not by how much money I have, how beautiful I am, how brilliant and all the other things by which we define our worth.

I don't have to struggle to be accepted and found worthy by God. I am already accepted in the beloved. I am so valuable that before God ever said that first "Let there be" he had thought of me, planned my existence, how I would live my life, what I would look like, how much I would weigh etc... and he chose me! Can you imagine that? (Ephesians 1:4, Psalm 139:16) Every single aspect of you was carefully thought out by God. Why then do people feel the need to point out things about you and say "This is not good?" I dare say that it is all good. All of it. Even your weaknesses and your mistakes may have been meant by the enemy for evil but God means them for good. How comforting!!!

It takes the burden from us and puts it on God. So I don't have to make all A's in school to be worth something. I don't have to look like a model to be acceptable and lovable. I don't have to have a certain net worth to actually have value. I just have to be me. The person God created me to be. The person I naturally gravitate to when I am in the Lord. That's all there is to it.

Just as salvation is not by works, our acceptance in the beloved is also not by works. We receive it in faith. Our value is not by works. It is received by faith. I am valuable. My worth is far above rubies not because of what I look like or what I can do, but because God says so! He thought so highly of me that he sent his son Jesus to be nailed on the cross so that I can be his. And if God could literally die to have me, then if man cannot see my worth I think its his loss!

Don't let anyone or anything else define your worth. Only your creator, who knows what he has put in you, can do that. He says you are beautiful, talented, creative, to die for, your worth is far above rubies, you are too valuable!! Priceless!! You are a gem!!

Who Told You That You Were Naked?

2011-05-23T19:09:00.000+03:00

"Who told you that you were naked?" (Genesis 3:11) This is the question God asks Adam and Eve when he finds them hiding in the bushes wearing their fig aprons. Basically he was asking them, "Who told you that something is wrong with you?" God knew that the enemy had come over and spoken to them for sure.

I have had the enemy talk to me before and the one thing he seems to be really good at saying is that I am not attractive. Today God asked me the same question he asked Adam and Eve "Who told you that you are unattractive?" When I thought about it I realized that all of it had come to me by suggestion in the soulish realm. Why do I say that? Because the enemy speaks to you on the soulish level and not spirit. He makes a suggestion through a commercial and all of a sudden all the dark people feel that they need to become lighter to be beautiful. You're watching Tyra and you realize that beauty is defined as a skinny girl and even the girls they call big are really normal sized chics.

Those suggestions begin to run through your mind and before you know it you are reacting and acting based on the belief that you are not beautiful. In truth, God made each one of us beautiful and then he loaded us with talents, giftings, callings, excellent temperaments and so much more. When God looked at man he knew for a fact that he had made a show stopper, and just when creation thought he couldn't do a better job, he puts the guy to sleep and creates the most beautiful creation of all, WOMAN!

Now, that said, who told you that you were too skinny, or too fat, or not intelligent enough, or good for nothing? Did God say that to you? If not, why are you listening to a voice other than God's? I have noticed something wonderful about people who do not have classic good looks (by man's standard) they usually have a redeeming aspect to them. A man who would not otherwise catch your eye based on his looks turns out to be charming, well spoken, kind and fun to be with. Within no time you don't even notice that he is too dark, or shorter than you are, or way too skinny. The grace of God steps in and covers his "shortcomings" so that you fall in love with him as he is.

Shouldn't we as women then be able to look at ourselves in the mirror and see what God see's? Granted you are a little bit on the heavy side, or maybe you are very dark and yet for some, maybe you don't think your facial features are stunning in a positive way. How about we look in the mirror and see just how valuable we are, how talented, how gifted and successful we are at the callings God has given us? How about we invite the Grace of God to come in and cover the parts of us that we feel may not be quite so becoming?

Do you know why God did not think that Adam and Eve were naked? Or why they had never felt naked and ashamed before? It was because the glory of the Lord covered them. Let that same glory cover and beautify you so that you feel and look attractive not just in the spiritual but in the physical realm too. Often I have seen guys give me a look in a manner likely to suggest interest. In truth, I have often reacted in such a way as to make sure they know that I couldn't be bothered. I have come to realize that that was me hiding because I did not feel beautiful or attractive enough.

Well, not anymore!! This girl will soon be dating up a storm. I am letting myself love and be loved. I am letting my beauty shine through in every way. Won't you join me?

Feeling Inadequate!

2011-05-21T11:08:00.003+03:00

Today was one of those days where I felt very inadequate as a woman. I'm talking to my BFF who is a Sanguine. She is good at showing emotion and expressing her love, good at making conversation, drawing people out of their shells etc... I on the other hand can make conversation but if you are in a shell, I'll let you stay there. I will rarely, if ever, try to coax someone to tell what they are thinking or feeling or whatever. I am not emotionally expressive and don't show love unless I feel very comfortable with you...and that could take a while.

Well, so we were talking about these guys that we feel drawn to as friends and thinking about how we can help them with some of the stuff they are doing. Here I am talking about it from the business end of things. You know? Like I can assist here and give some ideas there and she says that she will let them handle business and when they leave all that she will assist in allowing them to debrief to her. I'm like what? Here I'm talking about giving them business ideas and she's talking about being their personal psychologist!

Honestly, I have never felt less feminine than I did at that moment. I thought to myself, if this is what a woman is supposed to be like, I have so missed the plot. I almost felt like I was offering the wrong kind of help. Like I was going to be considered one of the guys and not a girl. Is this why guys are attracted to her? I really wondered about that.

Then I realized that God has made each woman suitable to be a helper to her own husband. My kind of help will be much needed when I do meet my husband. He will still be able to debrief with me and will also appreciate that I can help with business, organize the home and all the other things that choleric women are strong at. Needless to say, my self worth was out of the gutter!

Wisdom for the Hour!

2011-05-20T10:06:00.002+03:00

If you want to know what God wants you to do, ask him,

and he will gladly tell you,

for he is always ready to give a bountiful supply of wisdom to all who ask him;

he will not resent it.

But when you ask him,

be sure that you really expect him to tell you,

for a doubtful mind will be as unsettled as a wave of the sea

that is driven and tossed by the wind;

and every decision you make will be uncertain,

as you turn first this way, and then that.

If you don't ask with faith,

don't expect the Lord to give you any solid answer.

James 1:5-8 (Living Bible)

Lord, load me up with wisdom for this hour. I need to know if this is it. If not, I will gladly walk away. Make it clear for me so that I can do only your will. Thank you for sharing your wisdom with me. I love you!

God Knows My Heart!

2011-05-20T09:41:00.002+03:00

Oh Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.

You know when I sit or stand.

When far away you know my every thought.

You chart the path ahead of me, and tell me where to stop and rest.

Every moment you know where I am.

You know what I am going to say before I even say it.

You both precede and follow me, and place your hand of blessing on my head.

... I can never be lost to your Spirit! I can never get away from my God!

...You saw me before I was born and scheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe.

Every day was recorded in your book!

How precious it is, Lord, to realize that you are thinking about me constantly!

I can't even count how many times a day your thoughts turn towards me.

And when I waken in the morning, you are still thinking of me!

... Search me, O God, and know my heart; test my thoughts.

Point out anything you find in me that makes you sad,

and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

Psalm 139 (The Living Bible)

So often I forget that you are thinking of me. That my days are all planned out by you Lord. I am not forgotten. You think about me constantly... how you love me, how you want to bless me, what additional good you can bring into my life. You ponder the path of my feet and think about the next step before I even know where I'm at currently. When I go to bed you are thinking about me, and when I wake up your thoughts are still on me. I love you Lord with all my heart. You know this full well.

I submit my life, my will, my all to you once again. Lead me in the way everlasting. Fulfill in my life each day that is written in your book. I want nothing less! Who I'm I that you are mindful of me? That you hear me when I call? It is true that your ear is inclined towards me constantly and you keep me as the apple of your eye. Were the enemy to touch me, you would rise up Oh Lion of Judah and tear him to pieces for me.

Search my heart Oh God and know my thoughts. See the desires of my heart and fulfill them in accordance with your will. Point out those things in my life that make you sad and help me change them. All I want is to bring you honor and glory with all that I am.

Daddy, I never want to bring you shame or to let you down. I want more than anything, to be a daughter you can be proud of. Give me the wisdom I need to navigate this season of my life.

Love Them Regardless

2011-05-17T11:53:00.006+03:00

Loving people is a challenge for just about anyone, but for us Choleric's it is a chore! Hard work! A choleric may love you but be unable to show that love, especially if there is a chance that it will not be returned. Can you imagine the drama of having a crush on a guy who looks like he doesn't know you exist in that sense? Help me Jesus!!!

Well, I generally don't want to invest myself emotionally on anything or anyone if the end result is not already semi guaranteed. These situations where you are not sure of what the result or response will be do not work for me one bit. I need to have an inkling that you like me or want to be with me before I can show you that I like you. You know what I mean?!!

Anyway, there is this guy. I have no idea what it is about him that I like so much. Even though I like him, it is from afar. I am not even trying to invest my emotions on him and end up with a broken heart. As I was meditating on that and trying to figure out how I can be his friend without over investing myself I hear the voice of the Lord tell me that I am to love all people as he loves me.

I look up at the ceiling, raise one eyebrow and ask "how is that?" He goes on to show me that while we were yet sinners, while we had nothing to attract us to him, he loved us. So much so, that he took the ultimate gamble and gave up his life for us. He invested himself in man, body, soul and spirit and waited to see if we would accept his love for us and return the same. To date, he is still waiting for some to say yes Lord, but for those who accept and love the Lord Jesus, his gamble has paid off big time!!

So, I am not suggesting that you get careless with your heart, but sometimes you just need to go in the deep end and love some of these people regardless of whether they will love you back or not. Isn't that what Christ did for you? So I am determined to love this guy the way Christ loved me. To invest my time, emotions, prayers etc... in him. If he ever loves me back, great! If he never does, my love tank will remain full, because Jesus, the lover of my soul is doing an excellent job of loving me.

Surrounded By Death!

2011-05-09T12:59:00.002+03:00

Everywhere I look I see death these days. If I am not dying to self, I am dying to some desire or other... Or someone I know and love is dying (RIP Dad)... or my friends are hooking up with their significant others and our relationship is dying. Death all round!

The Lord is not slack concerning his promise

2011-05-05T08:41:00.003+03:00

2 Peter 3:9
The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness

This is the hardest verse in the Bible for me right now. How can he not be slack in his promises when he won't give me the one main desire of my heart? I don't understand. Maybe its about timing but Lord, I need you to help me wait on you with a joyful heart. I'm losing my joy and that has been my strength. Without joy i'm a gonna and you know it. Please help me stay joyful and keep my eye on the ball.

Look and See!

2011-03-22T10:09:00.004+03:00

This verse jumped out at me today and made sense. Isn't it interesting how God will allow you to sit somewhere looking on something happening without really seeing it for what it is. Then one day, in the fullness of time, the scales fall from your eyes and you see things for what they really are. Exodus 2:11 says

"One day, after Moses was grown, it happened that he went out to his brethren and looked at their burdens; and he saw an Egyptian beating a Hebrew, one of [Moses'] brethren".

Moses was 40 years old at this time. I don't believe that this was the first time he saw the oppression of the Hebrews, but that day when he went out to his brethren he did not just look at them generally, he looked at their burdens. He looked at the yoke that was laid on them and for the very first time in 40 years he saw!

I believe that God kept his understanding clouded on the issue because there were things he needed to learn while there and also because the fullness of time was not yet. When the time came for God to draw him near to himself he called him away by causing the incidents that followed after he finally understood just how oppressed his people were.

I am going through such a time as well where God has opened my eyes to see somethings I had never seen before. But I also believe that all this has happened to provoke movement and change of direction in my life to the glory of his name. May I only walk towards his will for me to the fulfillment of my destiny and never away. We serve a good God oh!!!

What do I still lack?

2011-03-08T06:14:00.003+03:00

The story of the rich young ruler is told in the books of Matthew, Mark and Luke. The fact that it is repeated in 3 out of the 4 gospels tells me that it was a very important lesson that we need to learn. This young ruler came to Jesus asking him what he must do to have eternal life. I find it interesting that Jesus told him to focus on the basics as listed in the 10 commandments. The young man said that he observed all these things. It is clear that he felt that he was not yet there as he asked the Lord "...what do I still lack?" Jesus told him to sell his material goods, give the money to the poor and follow him.

Now, I don't believe that Jesus wants us all to take the vow of poverty. On the contrary I believe that God wants to put wealth into our hands. However, I do believe that God does not want that wealth to have our hearts. This young ruler, although he was doing all the right things like many Christians today, was held in the grip of materialism. In today's world he would have been saved like you and I. He would have been a tither and give both mandatory and free will offerings. We would have looked at him and would have thought that for sure this guy had attained eternal life. However, his heart did not belong to God. It belonged to his wealth.

The Bible records that he went away very sad and Jesus made the comment that it was easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God. So what is the antidote for materialism. How can we avoid the fowler's snare that this young man found himself in?

God must be the center of our lives. We cannot look to the left or to the right. We must let God be all in all. Our eyes must be on him alone. I have resolved that when I am in his presence I will focus on him. I will not ask him for material wealth but will thank him for his provision because his word says that if we seek him first, all these things shall be added to us.
We must evaluate our lives honestly and see what has our hearts. What is it that I am not willing to do without? What would I begrudge God, should he tell me to give it away? The Isaac test was for God to be sure that Abraham's heart was in the right place. Would you give away your Isaac?

I think about Hannah. She begged God for a son, crying as if her heart would break. Then God gives her this child and tells her that she must then be separated from him as soon as he is weaned. If you were Hannah, would you give God your son? What is that one thing that you want for yourself so badly? What have you been crying out for? What have you travailed for and finally received? If God asked you for it, would you give it back? Sela!

The Final Battle

2011-03-08T05:35:00.002+03:00

According to Revelation 13:16 the last battle that man and the enemy are going to engage in will be fought out in the marketplace. I had never seen this before until I realized that in order to buy or sell anything you will have to bear the mark of the enemy. This tells me that the economic world is crucial for the devils end time agenda.

I have heard that drug dealers, in a bid to create a market for their product, will offer it for free to a person and once they are hooked on it and cannot do without it, they then withhold it from them unless they can pay for it. In their desperation, the drug addict will do anything to secure another hit. They will steal, kill and prostitute just to get the next hit. This is the devil's strategy for us as well where the economic world is concerned. He has created such a "need" for the things of this world that even the Church has been caught up in a materialistic frenzy of epic proportions. In many churches today, the minor things have become the major things, while the major things have become the minor things.

Anything that has your heart, if it is not God, is an idol to you. If wealth has your heart it is an idol to you. In many churches most of the sermons are about money. The manipulation has become ridiculous. It almost feels like if you do not give a certain amount God will not look at you twice. Yet our God is not like that. The spirit of materialism has so pervaded the church that it is now on the altar and has become an idol to be worshiped by the people. An abomination that causes desolation. The sermon's are watered down. The people are stuck in their sins with no help. The sick are still sick. We see no miracles, signs or wonders to confirm the word of the Lord. Why? What has changed?

We have majored on the minors. It is about souls. It is about God. Let him be on the altar. Let him be worshiped. I have been hearing God say to me this year, "go back to the basics." Love your neighbor. Honor your Father and Mother. Bring all your tithes and offerings to the house. Forgive those who trespass against you. Be holy for I am holy. Do not abuse Grace. Sit here and stay right with me. These are the things that matter to God. I hate to say this, but ambitious church programs will not get it done. Having a church full of people and not teaching them how to walk right will not help them. If all they can think about, pray about, wail about in their homes is "God give me more money so I too can live well, eat well, drive the best and go on holiday to some exotic location" there is a problem. If the measure of whether or not you are blessed is how much wealth you have, then there is a problem.

I am not against living well. I believe as children of the King we should live well. However, that is not our goal in life. Our testimonies cannot be just about how God increased our income or how we have a new car. We need to have testimonies about how many people we spoke to about Christ. How many people we have prayed for and seen the manifestation of God in tangible healing and deliverance. If these were the testimonies we heard in church, how many people would be saved?

My heart breaks when I read the last verses of the faith chapter, Hebrews 11:35-38

"...Others were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that they might obtain a better resurrection. ³⁶ Still others had trial of mockings and scourgings, yes, and of chains and imprisonment. ³⁷ They were stoned, they were sawn in two, were tempted,were slain with the sword. They wandered about in sheepskins and goatskins, being destitute, afflicted, tormented— ³⁸ of whom the world was not worthy. They wandered in deserts and mountains, indens and caves of the earth."

Those described in this passage endured hell and held on to the Lord. They never had a good house, they lived in caves and dens and holes in the ground. They were destitute for this gospel. They were afflicted and tormented, mocked and whipped to a bloody pulp. They were tempted being promised all the wonderful material things we crave if only they would recant. Yet for this gospel, the true gospel of Christ, they refused to give in. The world was not worthy of them.

In the final marketplace battle this same scenario will be repeated. How many of us will be willing to walk away from all that we have to live in a den or a cave because of the gospel. I dare say that the addiction strategy of the enemy is such that he has many Christians hooked to materialism. Many would accept the mark and sell their souls instead of giving up their material comforts.

Who or what has your heart? No, really, who or what has your heart? Meditate on that and let the honest answer come to you.

Marked with God's Mark

2011-03-08T05:19:00.002+03:00

On March 2nd the Lord began to speak to me about marking me with his mark. As I was praying that morning his presence was heavy on me and I could almost feel him place his mark, his seal, on my forehead. On March 3rd I felt the need to study this marking and why the Lord would mark his people. Turns out that on various occasions, when the Lord was about to bring judgement he marked his people to exempt them from the coming upheaval.

The first incident I noted of a marking was in the book of Exodus where he tells the Israelites to put the blood of a lamb on their door posts. That way when the angel of judgement came, he would see the blood and pass over them.
The second place I saw this was in the book of Ezekiel 9:1-6. In this passage God is about to release his army for judgement. However, he asks them to wait until those who are his have been marked. The army of the Lord is then given instructions not to harm anyone with the mark of God on them.
Revelation 7:1-4 is another such passage. Once again God holds his troops until his own people have been marked on their foreheads. The troops are then commanded not to touch them as they execute the orders of the Lord.

One thing we do not understand is that we are in the Last days and in this last days we are going to bear a mark of ownership whether we like it or not. You are either going to be marked with the mark of God, or with the mark of the devil. Revelation 7 talks about the seal of God that bears his name. Each one who is a bond servant of our God will have this mark. Revelation 13 talks about another seal. The mark of the devil that bears his name or the number of his name, the famous 666. Based on where we are in history the question becomes, "Which mark is going to be on your forehead?" We get to decide based on the way we are living our lives today.

The Counsel of the Lord - My Treasure!

2011-01-18T20:14:00.005+03:00

Lately my heart has been crying out for the counsel of the Lord. I just feel like I am waiting for certain instruction for the next phase of my life and this instruction is God's counsel to me.

The Bible says that Jesus is also a counselor and the Holy Spirit is referred to as the Spirit of Counsel and Might. On many occasions we see God angry at Israel because:

1) They did not seek his counsel (Joshua 9:14)

2) On other occasions they sought his counsel but did not heed it once they got it, instead they despised it (Ps 106:13, 107:11)

My job right now is to seek his counsel and once I have the counsel of the Lord, I must carry it out to the glory of his name. Both of these actions resulted in harm to Israel.

God is more than willing to share his counsel with us and we need to be just as ready to execute that counsel so that his will can be done on earth as it is in heaven and that his Kingdom may come on the earth.

Job 15:8

Have you heard the counsel of God?

Job 29:4

When the friendly counsel of God was over my tent

Psalm 16:7

I will bless the LORD who has given me counsel;

Psalm 33:11

The counsel of the LORD stands forever,

The plans of His heart to all generations.

Psalm 73:24

You will guide me with Your counsel

Proverbs 3:32

For the perverse person is an abomination to the LORD,

But His secret counsel is with the upright.

Proverbs 8:14

Counsel is mine, and sound wisdom;

I am understanding, I have strength.

Proverbs 19:21

There are many plans in a man’s heart,

Nevertheless the LORD’s counsel—that will stand.

Isaiah 5:19

And let the counsel of the Holy One of Israel draw near and come,

That we may know it.

Isaiah 28:29
This also comes from the LORD of hosts,
Whois wonderful in counsel and excellent in guidance.

Zechariah 6:13
And the counsel of peace shall be between them both.

Ephesians 1:11
In Him also we have obtained an inheritance, being predestined according to the purpose of Him who works all things according to the counsel of His will.

Amazed at God!

2010-11-26T22:09:00.002+03:00

Who is this God we serve? This great and awesome God who sits upon the throne. The earth and the sky see him and flee, folding up like a scroll. Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God Almighty, the whole earth is full of his glory! This great and awesome God has chosen me. I cry out with Isaiah "My eyes have seen the King!" He has chosen me. I am in awe of him.

This God has stooped down to make me great! He has chosen me, one who was counted among the foolish of the earth, that he may confound the wise. I am the least likely, but he has chosen me to do the almighty! Who I'm I Lord, that you are mindful of me?!

1 Samuel 2

⁵ Those who were full hire themselves out for food,
but those who were hungry are hungry no more.
She who was barren has borne seven children,
but she who has had many sons pines away.

⁶ “The LORD brings death and makes alive;
he brings down to the grave and raises up.
⁷ The LORD sends poverty and wealth;
he humbles and he exalts.
⁸ He raises the poor from the dust
and lifts the needy from the ash heap;
he seats them with princes
and has them inherit a throne of honor.

“For the foundations of the earth are the LORD’s;
on them he has set the world.
⁹ He will guard the feet of his faithful servants,
but the wicked will be silenced in the place of darkness.

“It is not by strength that one prevails;

I found it!!

2010-11-24T12:23:00.003+03:00

This is what I have been crying out for all morning. I found it!

Ephesians 3:19 Amplified

[That you may really come] to know [practically, through experience for yourselves] the love of Christ, which far surpasses mere knowledge [without experience]; that you may be filled [through all your being] unto all the fullness of God [may have the richest measure of the divine Presence, and become a body wholly filled and flooded with God Himself]!

Fill me with as much you as I can take without exploding Lord. Fill me with the richest measure of you that I was created to carry. I want to be a body wholly filled and flooded with you my God! Do it for me Lord and do not delay!

Fill Me! Possess Me!

2010-11-24T11:37:00.004+03:00

I want to be full. Full of your Spirit Lord. So full that he manifests in all that I am and all that pertains to me. So full that my shadow can heal the sick, and my bones, after I am dead and buried can raise the dead. So full, that clothes from my body and handkerchiefs belonging to me can heal the sick. I want to be so full that it is no longer I that live, but you who lives in me. Fill me! Fill me! My heart cries out to you Oh Lord. Fill me to over flowing! Soak me in your river. Dunk me under getting me soaking wet with your Spirit.

Once I saw a girl who was possessed by an evil spirit. She looked at me with a knowing look. I had never seen her or met her before, yet she recognized me or something in me. I remember looking at that girl, she must have been 12-14 years old and thinking to myself that what was looking at me out of her eyes was not her. It was something else. A different spirit.

Lord, if a demon can manifest itself in a girl and look out of her eyes at me, and I know that the world of the enemy copies you, then your Spirit can fill me so much as to possess me. So that he looks through my eyes, he hears with my ears, he feels with my heart, he thinks with my mind, he answers with my tongue, he touches those in the world with my hands. It can be done! I am giving myself to you in whole hearted surrender. Take me! Fill me! Possess me Holy Spirit! Use me! Show me my purpose and walk it out through me.

Isaiah 11

²And the Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon Him--the Spirit of wisdom and understanding, the Spirit of counsel and might, the Spirit of knowledge and of the reverential and obedient fear of the Lord--

³And shall make Him of quick understanding, and His delight shall be in the reverential and obedient fear of the Lord. And He shall not judge by the sight of His eyes, neither decide by the hearing of His ears;

⁴But with righteousness and justice shall He judge the poor and decide with fairness for the meek, the poor, and the downtrodden of the earth; and He shall smite the earth and the oppressor with the rod of His mouth, and with the breath of His lips He shall slay the wicked.

⁵And righteousness shall be the girdle of His waist and faithfulness the girdle of His loins.

I Am Yours!

2010-11-24T10:33:00.003+03:00

I am yours Lord. How can I say it enough? How can I show you enough? I am yours spirit, soul and body. Thank you for teaching me about me. About how you made me. So that I can see how I have done things in the past and how I ought to do them now. I am a triune being just like you. Where you are Father, Son and Holy Ghost, I am Spirit, Soul and Body. Made in your image and in your likeness.

My Spirit - The part that communicates with you.

My Body - The part that communicates with this world you have put me in.

My Soul - The true essence of my being.

I am a soul that lives in a body and has a spirit. I am a soul. A soul has a mind and heart. The mind is the seat of my intellect, reasoning, learning etc... My heart is the seat of my emotions. God made me this way because he is the same way. He thinks, he reasons, he is all knowing so I guess he doesn't learn new things. He feels, so he has emotions. He gets angry, he laughs, he weeps... I am made just like him.

The external world is not to dominate my soul so that I am affected by what I see and hear in the natural more than by what I see and hear in the spiritual. I am to be introverted in that I look within for answers. I look within for solutions and for the way in which I should walk. What do I mean within? I mean into my spirit where the Holy Spirit resides and speaks. He should be my source. He should be the final word regardless of what I see and hear on the outside.

Lord, you have said that in these last days you will pour out all your Spirit on your sons and daughters here on the earth. Here I am. I have come. It is written about me in your book. Pour out all your Spirit in me that I may manifest as a son of God on the earth. My heart Lord is that heaven would find expression on the earth through me. Do not delay Lord. You have called me and set me apart and said of me "I have need of you!" Therefore use me now Lord. Do not delay. I have come to answer the call.

You asked, "who shall I send, and who shall go for us" and I have answered "Here I am. Send me."

It is enough! It is enough that you love me. It is enough that you have favored me. It is enough that you have drawn me near and called me your own. It is enough that you have delighted yourself in me and chosen to honor me Lord. My heart is content. Only draw me closer still. Only bring me deeper still. Until the river becomes a flood, water in which I am forced to swim.

Who have I on earth but you? And in heaven, who have I besides you? You are my all in all. You are the apple of my eye. You are the darling of my heart. I love you with all that I am. I bless you. May I always be a delight to you dear Lord. All the days of my existence both here on earth and beyond!

Laying Siege

2010-11-18T08:10:00.002+03:00

This year has been awesome in many ways, but for sure there are times when nothing has worked like I have wanted it to. The work of my hands has struggled in so many ways, yet God has supplied all my needs and more. Somehow I feel disappointed. A lot of my expectations have not been met. I feel like it has been an upward climb and a hard one at that. Still God has given me favor on all sides and fortitude to keep pushing against the wall that stands in front of me. I am convinced that if I can just break through this invisible wall, I can get to the other side. Which is where I want to be. I have been laying siege all year. Surely my breakthrough is near. May God give me the strength to hang in there until the walls come tumbling down. It is my hour.

Death Valley

2010-11-10T09:33:00.003+03:00

There is life to be found only on the other side of death. But walking through death valley is the hardest thing I ever did. A while back the Lord took me to Psalm 23 and focussed in on verse 3

"he refreshes my soul.

He guides me along the right paths

for his name’s sake".

Even though I read it and highlighted it and knew there was meaning to it, I didn't quite comprehend what it was all about. Until today. Hindsight really is 20:20. The following verse reads

"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death..."

That is one place none of us wants to be at, but each one of us must get to the place where we die to self. Some deaths are easier than others but then there are those places in life where you can't explain to anyone what is happening to you. All you know is that you are dying. That you must lay yourself and your will on the altar and die without knowing what is on the other side of death.

Yet I know that there is life on the other side of death. A life that can only be found on the other side of death. Abraham received confirmation of the promise after he gave his son up as a sacrifice to the Lord. He must have died a thousand deaths walking his son to the mountain of sacrifice. But he had to. He was submitted to this God just like you and I are and there was nothing he could keep from him. Not even his only son.

God must know, that he knows, that he knows, that he is your first love. He must weigh and test the heart of man over and over again to be able to say like he did with Abraham in Genesis 22

"now I know that you fear God, since you have not withheld your son, your only son, from Me.”

Is there anything I can withhold from God? Not a thing. Therefore I must give it all up if I must and die a thousand deaths if I must until my Lord is satisfied that my heart loves him. Mine is to trust him that he is indeed leading me in paths of righteousness for his names sake. That when I come out of death valley there will be a table laid out for me in the presence of my enemies. That as I continue to trust in him he will somehow fulfill the desires of my heart according to his word and his promise.

In the meantime Lord, let your rod and your staff comfort me and let your goodness, mercy and unfailing love follow me all the days of my life!

Honor

2010-10-28T05:23:00.002+03:00

Honor. This is a word that honestly has been lost to our society. However, it is a very common word in the Bible. What is honor? According to Websters dictionary: Honor is excellence of character, high moral worth, integrity, uprightness, trustworthiness. It also includes purity and chastity. A person of honor knows what is right, just and true and does it. He or she is aware of all duties imposed by his conscience, position and privilege and acts on these duties. How would you know what is honorable? Honorable things attract esteem, respect and consideration.

In this light, the story of Jabez is given a whole new light. The Bible says he was honorable meaning that he was of high moral worth, of excellent character, integrous, upright and worthy of trust. 1 Chron 4:9-10

⁹Jabez was honorable above his brothers; but his mother named him Jabez [sorrow maker], saying, Because I bore him in pain.

¹⁰Jabez cried to the God of Israel, saying, Oh, that You would bless me and enlarge my border, and that Your hand might be with me, and You would keep me from evil so it might not hurt me! And God granted his request.

This story says that your honor has clout with God. If you are honorable and upright and ask God to bless you and enlarge your border, God can trust you with more and bless you indeed. But if you are without honor, how can God give you more than just sustenance?

So who is the man that God is pleased to Honor?

Over and over in the Bible God says that it is the man that honors him that he will in turn honor. With this he also directly links honor with humility. But what is humility? It is defined as freedom from pride and arrogance. A humbleness of mind, a modest estimation of your own worth, a sense of your own unworthiness in the sight of God, penitence for sin and even submission to divine will. The expression of humility is difficult for most people, myself included because we expect it to be an outward action.

In my own view, humility is knowing that without God I am nothing and can do nothing. Led by that knowledge, I accept him as my savior and Lord of my life. That done, I hand over my will to him and ask him to lead my every move. It means that I seek him often because I know that if he does not guide my steps I will make a false move. It is refusing to despise people in my heart but loving them with the love of God at all times. Humility is a condition of the heart and we all know that the heart, according to Jeremiah is deceptive and wicked above all things. It is therefore quite possible to think you are a humble person but you are not.

I am not sure if it was a book I was reading or a movie I was watching but this guy was brought to his knees by his oppressors. While on his knees before them, while they were shouting in triumph and looking down their noses at him on his knees, he made a very profound statement. He said "I may be on my knees, but on the inside I am standing up!" That was a tear jerking moment! But the opposite should be true for us believers. As God elevates us and promotes us to positions of honor we may be standing up on the outside, but on the inside we are on our knees in humility before God!

True humility is the road to honor and glory in God. The book of Esther talks about her uncle Mordecai who would not kneel before Haman. To all around him it looked like the height of pride and arrogance. However, all Mordecai was doing was honoring God above man. So Haman plans his demise and that of all his Jewish people. In Chapter 6 God decides to show Mordecai honor because he honored him and decides to use the King to do this. The King is in a dilemma about what to do and by God's genius Haman had just walked in. The King asks a question that blesses me. He says "What shall be done for the man the King wishes to Honor?" What shall be done for the man that King Jesus wishes to Honor? What shall be done for the man Jehovah wishes to honor? What shall be done?

Ours is not to know what shall be done, ours is to become the man that God would be pleased to honor. Are you that person? Can God sit in heaven and ask, "what shall be done for my daughter Cynthia whom I am pleased to honor?" Would God be pleased to Honor you?

HE WILL NEVER FORSAKE ME

2010-10-20T06:58:00.001+03:00

The other day I sinned in such a way as to shock myself. I have read in books by Mahesh Chavda that fasting is like skimming milk. It causes that which is hidden within you to rise so God can skim it off you. Boy! Did it ever! I could not believe myself. Anyway, in the midst of all my guilt and shame God took that opportunity to teach me about his unmerited favor and what it means when he says I will never leave you nor forsake you.

Flash back to Calvary. Jesus is hanging on that cross for you and me and a great divine exchange is taking place. All our sins are being placed on him so that he is black with it. God the Father, who cannot stand sin backs away from Jesus turning his face away from him. Up till now Jesus has had the awesome presence of the Almighty giving him strength. He feels the Father withdraw from him and cries “Eloi, Eloi, lama Sabachthani?” which means “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” He is totally alone in the world. Utterly naked and abandoned because of the sin that now covers him. But guess what? He went through that so that you and I will never be forsaken even when we fall. What a divine exchange!

If you have accepted the covering of the cross of Jesus which is salvation, when God looks at you he sees you through the lens of what happened on Calvary. This means that when you sin, like I did, God looks at you, sees the blood of Calvary and stays by your side. He never, ever forsakes you because he already forsook Christ at Calvary. When you repent he is quick to forgive you and wash away that guilty stain.

Usually when I sin in a big way (in my human mind there are dimensions of sin) even though I repent I am racked with guilt. Then I go around worrying that God will leave me because of what I did and that he won’t help me anymore or show me the favor I have been enjoying in him up until the “great” sin. This time he told me that no matter what I do, he will not leave me nor forsake me. I must repent and turn away from the sin but his commitment to me, as long as I am in Christ is that he will always be by my side and with that, he will always give me his unmerited favor which is my help.

Christians tend to think that if we are spotless then God will favor us. In truth, there is nothing we can do to merit or deserve God’s favor. That is why it is unmerited favor. You can’t earn it. He just gives it to you. Got it!! The notion that when you sin God backs away from you, which is how many of us were taught about what happened at Calvary, is a half truth. When God sees me, he sees his son on Calvary, remembers that my sins past, present and future are already paid for and stays right by my side. What an awesome revelation! Therefore I can still approach the throne of God with boldness to repent of my sin and ask for the blood of Calvary to wash away that guilty stain so that I will still be presented on that day without spot or wrinkle.

Kairos - When Time Meets Destiny

2010-10-04T20:09:00.004+03:00

This morning an angel woke me up with a tap on my arm. I woke up immediately but I was still groggy. Then I heard in my spirit to read Ecclesiastes 3. It talks about divinely appointed times. I must say that I am in an Kairos season of life. A door has been opened to me and God is requiring me to walk in the calling he has for me. He spoke to me through Acts 13:2 "Set apart for me Cynthia for the work to which I have called her" (my interpretation).

On the night of October 1st I went to bed at 9 exhausted. At 1:59 I woke up alert knowing that God had something to teach me. A friend and I had been talking about a vision I had in which I was taken up to heaven and the Spirit of the Lord had laid his hand on my forehead and imparted wisdom to me. As we were talking, the Spirit reminded me of the passage that says "Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid their hands on you." (1 Tim 5:14) I realized that when I had that experience I had not known what to do with the gift but that it was still in me. Neglected and lying dormant.

When I woke up the Lord started showing me through his word what a valuable gift wisdom is and that man does not really understand its worth. As such, rarely are we taught about the more quiet gift of wisdom. Many people prefer the more vocal gifts, but this gem tends to lie neglected and yet the Bible says give everything up to attain wisdom if you must. It is more costly than Gold or silver. God speaks about it in his word over and over again. He gives us the root of it as "The fear of the Lord" and in Proverbs 4:7 he says

"Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom.

Though it cost all you have, get understanding."

This morning God started to show me that by his wisdom he has set for us appointed times in our lives. Kairos times. Kairos is a greek word that means opportune time, right time or seasonal time. I am in my Kairos time. My doors have opened and I must seize the moment! According to Donna Kazenske, Kairos can be described as a God given moment of destiny. It is a time to be seized with decisiveness! It’s the alignment of natural and supernatural forces creating an environment for an opening to occur; a time when heaven and earth align with one another in a spiritual sense; a time when heaven touches earth in a way that will never be forgotten. Kairos is a particular moment, out of all the ordinary moments in time that has the capability to forever change the outcome of time itself. Kairos is the moment of decision, the moment of action, the moment of change. It can be a moment, or it can be an entire season of moments.

I am right smack in my Kairos season and I refuse to miss the day of my visitation. I refuse to be too afraid to make the necessary moves. I refuse to hesitate. I will move forward in boldness and confidence in God to seize my Kairos moments in the name of Jesus!!! Kairos, my moment to step into destiny. This is my hour and I must walk in my calling!!

Wholly Devoted To Him!

2010-10-04T20:05:00.002+03:00

This God we serve, who can understand him? On the 15th of September I put up a blog with the heading "Would I?" talking about would I give it all up to follow him. This came out of the following passage:

Mark 10:29-31

²⁹"I tell you the truth," Jesus replied, "no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel ³⁰will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life.³¹But many who are first will be last, and the last first."

I have never understood this passage before. The other day I heard the Lord ask me, "Would you give up your hope for marriage and children to be wholly devoted and focussed on me?" Honestly that was one of those questions I had never thought the Lord would ask me. I have always thought I would get married. Anyone who has followed this blog for any length of time will testify that marriage is a big deal for me. So what is this now?

I heard the Lord refer me to Paul's discourse in 1 Corinthians 7. I did not have the courage to read it. Not until today. This passage is extremely difficult to read. Paul says that staying single is better than being married. I have never heard anyone, other than Paul make a case for staying single for life. I have never heard a sermon on it. It is always mentioned in passing. But what if this is what God requires of me?

The word 'devoted' keeps jumping up at me. Particularly when put as "wholly devoted." I'm hearing God saying to come out and be wholly devoted to the work for which he called me. And this passage says that staying single allows one to be wholly devoted to the Lord without distraction. Would it be so bad to remain single all my life? Jesus said that if I give it up I will, in this world, still get my reward. I believe him. This one is still up in the air. My answer is that I want to serve him in the way that he thinks is best for me.

Strangely enough I hear him asking me to make the choice. That if I choose to be married it is well and if I choose to stay unmarried it is well. There is no condemnation. But he would prefer that I focus wholly on him. There are things he can show me and use me to do only when I am single. Free will!! What to do with it?!!

2 Corinthians 8:12 says "For if the willingness is there, the gift is acceptable according to what one has, not according to what he does not have"

Lord, make me willing to devote myself wholly to you. I want to be used by you to the uttermost. I feel the loss of what I would be giving up if I choose to remain single forever. Yet I want your best for me and if that means being single till death then you help me to be willing to make the choice. Not grudgingly Lord, but with joy. I am yours. All yours. Make me willing O God and have your way in me.

34 Strong!!

2010-09-27T08:44:00.002+03:00

They say that the older you get the better each birthday becomes. I can honestly say that it is true for me. I love each new year that the Lord gives me. This birthday is particularly exciting for me because of the things that God has been speaking to me as I fast. The numerology is awesome.

3 stands for the God Head

4 is a door as represented by the Dalet (number 4 in Hebrew).

7 is the number of completion resulting from the addition of 3 and 4.

I have been praying in line with these numbers and God keeps revealing more things to me. The number 4 is the one that has really stood out for me. God is talking about opening doors for me. The door to destiny. The definition of the word door is also quite interesting:

1) A door is a moveable barrier used to cover an opening.

2) Anything providing a means of access (or escape)

According to Wikipedia "Doors are often symbolically endowed with ritual purposes, and the guarding or receiving of the keys to a door, or being granted access to a door can have special significance"

Doors are also depicted as the portals through which the righteous may enter (Psalms 119:18) When God opens your eyes and you see wonderful things in his law, you see open doors in places you had not seen them before and God allows you to walk through them.

Another awesome thing that happened on Friday was that I was in a meeting at Kingdom Business Network when the man of God was led to anoint us with oil and prophesy over our lives. When he got to me he said:

"Stop waiting for the door to open. The sliding doors open for you when you move towards them. If you move in the direction you hear God telling you to move towards, the doors will open. Right now you are standing here waiting for the doors to open and they are waiting for you to make a move so they can open. "

After this I read the meaning of the word door in the back of my Bible and was amazed to find that Revelation 4:1 reads as follows:

"After this I looked, and there before me was a door standing open in heaven."

This is the season I have stepped into. The season of the open door and of access into the throne room of God. Friday and Saturday during times of worship I got to experience this open door to the throne room of God. On both occasions all I could do was weep as I realized that I was in the very throne room of God. On Friday I just had to prostrate myself before him and on Saturday I had to get on my knees. It is amazing that the God of the whole universe has allowed me to appear before him in Zion and join the 24 elders in crying out

"You are worthy, our Lord and God,

to receive glory and honor and power,

for you created all things,
and by your will they were created
and have their being."

I cannot even begin to tell you how real this experience has been for me and how precious. One thing that I know in my heart is that God himself has opened this door to me and no one can shut it. I am blessed!!

I also know that God has opened doors for me in heaven and on earth in line with my calling. I will walk boldly towards everything God has spoken to me and I know that I will see amazing things in God and you will read all about them here. God bless you and Happy Birthday to me!!

Ask Of Me...

2010-09-23T08:25:00.002+03:00

This morning I am amazed at the goodness of God. That the God of the whole universe, of Galaxies unknown would show up in my bedroom this morning and say:

"Ask what I should do for you in the next 3 months."

Interesting how when you hear something like this you begin to wonder if you are losing it. But out of the blue, God, who can read my mind from thousands of miles away, begins to share places in his word that he encourages his people to ask:

1 Kings 3:5

At Gibeon the LORD appeared to Solomon during the night in a dream, and God said, "Ask for whatever you want me to give you."

Psalm 2:8

Ask of me, and I will make the nations your inheritance, the ends of the earth your possession.

Zechariah 10:1
Ask the LORD for rain in the springtime;

So it is not strange that God would show up this morning on the 23rd day of my fast which is only 4 days to my birthday to ask such a thing. Speaking of the number 4, I will be 34 in 4 days. The number four is the dalet in hebrew and is depicted by the picture of a door. When I found that out it was quite significant for me because of my age.

Yesterday I fasted within my fast. That is to say that although I have been on a Daniel fast, yesterday I did liquids only from the night of the 21st to yesterday evening. In the afternoon I found myself crying out to God to remove the mystery in his word so that I could understand it. We are often told that God has revealed himself in his word but many times we read the word and come away without revelation of any kind. It is shrouded in mystery and only the Spirit of the Most High God can show you what he is talking about. As I was praying I found myself asking God to remove the veil. I do not want to be among them that see but do not perceive, who hear with their ears but cannot grasp and understand with their hearts. I need to read his word, perceive and grasp and understand God's meaning with my heart.

This morning when he asked me what I wanted, I felt like Herod's daughter after she had danced. She ran to her mother and said "What should I ask for?" And then it entered my heart to ask him to remove the veil. To open the door and let me into himself in the next 3 months. Everything I need is in him. If he can let me into himself I can understand me. I can have a greater sense of direction in this world. My husband and children, my riches and honor and everything else that I need are in him. I am so blessed to know this God.

Then I realized that I will be 34 and 3 is the number of divinity while 4 is depicted by a door. He interpreted it for me to mean that he will open the door into the God head. He will let me into himself and will remove the veil. I am so blessed. I am sitting here amazed and tickled at the same time. Amazed that the God of the universe would draw me deeper into himself and tickled at how awesome it will be to go in deeper. I said to him "Lord, bring me in like you brought Moses" God's testimony of Moses was:

Numbers 12:7-8a
⁷ But this is not true of my servant Moses;
he is faithful in all my house.
⁸ With him I speak face to face,
clearly and not in riddles;
he sees the form of the LORD.
34 will be a great year for me and in the next 3 months I believe I will see the mighty outpouring of the goodness of the Lord in my Life.
You can be sure that you will hear all about it on this blog so stay tuned!!

My 3 Fathers

2010-09-18T08:16:00.002+03:00

Bless the Lord oh my soul and forget not all his benefits!! I am rejoicing greatly today because I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I see the purpose of this fast. Surely when you seek God on any matter, you will find him. I will talk about what God has done for me at a later date when I can do so freely, but be informed, God is making the path for my feet very clear. I bless his name.

Today I want to talk about fatherhood and some of the things I am discovering along the way. My dad passed away on March 13th this year. As I said at the time, God stepped into that place he held in my heart immediately so that even though I missed dad terribly and grieved his death there was no void in me. I was still complete and whole. There was no emptiness. When we first learnt about dad's diabetes complications I had cried out to God in fear because dad had almost died. I could feel the huge void in me and did not want to have that emptiness. God was gracious and waited until I learnt to make him my true Father before taking dad.

Funny enough, now he has began to show me Fathers in the community who will step in to advice me as a father would. One is my best friend's dad who has so adopted me and indeed my family that he came for my sister's ruracio (ceremony to pay the bride price) after dad died. It was such a comfort to see how God had touched his heart for us and given him a sense of responsibility for the family. Mom was so honored to see him there too. This is the dad to whom I will take my boyfriend for the "daddy interrogation session" I am so blessed to have him.

The other Father that God has given me is Mr. Anthony Wahome of Linksoft Group. This father is the one who advices me on how to do life and business. When I think I am hearing God about something or when I want to make a career change or need business advice this is the Father to go to. He is so godly and such a blessing and I will be working very closely with him in the next season of my life.

Daddy No. 3 is my Pastor Allan Kiuna who I just love to bits. This daddy prays for me, cries for me, seeks God on my behalf. This father teaches me the ways of the Lord, how to walk uprightly before my God. He puts tools for success in my hand and blesses me Sunday after Sunday and other times in between. I love my pastor dearly.

These three men have been put in my path by God and are always ready to hear me if I need to speak. I pursue these fathers diligently because they have been put in place for me by God. I honor and treasure them. See how good God is, even though he has taken away my biological father, out of his death I have received 3 Fathers and Jehovah as well. I am blessed!!

Would I?

2010-09-15T19:56:00.003+03:00

I keep asking myself, "would I give it all up to follow Christ?" He says:

Mark 10:29-31

²⁹"I tell you the truth," Jesus replied, "no one who has left home or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields for me and the gospel ³⁰will fail to receive a hundred times as much in this present age (homes, brothers, sisters, mothers, children and fields—and with them, persecutions) and in the age to come, eternal life. ³¹But many who are first will be last, and the last first."

And then I think of the donkey that Jesus rode on to enter Jerusalem that final time and what he said about it in Mathew 21:3 "³If anyone says anything to you, tell him that the Lord needs them, and he will send them right away."

My mentor often says that he is the donkey that Christ is riding on. I hear Jesus saying "Come away with me Cynthia and if anyone asks you where you are going tell them 'the Lord needs me'"

Last night I had a dream with the picture of Christ entering Jerusalem on the donkey. And I was being instructed in the dream and the person instructing me said "they will welcome him with shouts of El Rei! El Rei!" I could see the words and the spelling was clear. I asked in the dream, "What does El Rei mean?" and the person instructing me said "You will find out." I woke up at some crazy hour of the night and googled those words and this is what I found. El Rei is Portuguese for "The King" interestingly enough the Spanish translation is "El Rey" but that was not what I saw. I clearly saw it spelled with an "i" at the end. I don't know what this dream means but "they shall welcome him with shouts of The King, The King!"

Now please note that I do not speak Spanish or Portuguese and these words were downloaded to me in the spirit. My intellect was absolutely clueless on what they meant until I googled them. How is that for food for thought?!!!

Sweet Forgiveness

2010-09-14T06:16:00.004+03:00

I thank God for Mahesh Chavda who has written an awesome book on prayer and fasting called "The hidden power of prayer and fasting." In it he talks about the power of a fast to cleanse by bringing to the surface hidden or underlying sin that the person may not even know exists. He gives an example of himself and how at one point he let out an expletive that shocked even him during a fast. He was surprised when the spirit of God, instead of being offended, showed him that he was bringing hidden sin to the surface.

It is as if milk has been put on a fire to boil. When you let it cool the cream forms at the top. That cream represents the hidden sins in your life. The Lord removes that sin as you would remove cream to skim milk then allows it to boil again that he may get more to the surface.

I have had two such incidences in the last 4 days. Boy was I embarrassed! Each time the Lord says "I am exposing some root causes of sin in your life so that we can deal with them." The Lord wants to make sure that those sins never show up again in my life. I think that because of this I am discovering the value of a prolonged fast. These sins have only shown up on day 10 and 13 of my fast. I was of course feeling very guilty as I kept thinking to myself "How can I sin like this when fasting?" But the Lord has ministered grace to me through the book of Zechariah 3.

In this wonderful chapter is Joshua who is a high priest through the calling of God. He stands before the Lord in filthy garments representing his sin. Satan the accuser of brethren has also come to point out just how filthy his garments are and to accuse him before the Lord. Joshua, guilty as sin (pun intended), does not say a word. He is clearly guilty as charged. But the Lord speaks up for him in verse 2 and rebukes the devil:

The LORD said to Satan, "The LORD rebuke you, Satan! The LORD, who has chosen Jerusalem, rebuke you! Is not this man a burning stick snatched from the fire?"

Then he commands that clean rich garments be put on Joshua and that a turban be put on his head. The priestly turban read "Holy to the Lord." He is reinstated to his position of service and authority in God with the command to walk in his ways and keep his requirements. I thank God for this chapter because it speaks also of us who are kings and priests to our God! We also through repentance have been forgiven and reinstated to our positions in God. The accuser of brethren has been rebuked for us. We shall make it in God in Jesus Name! When you fall be encouraged and repent. Ask God to take away the root cause of that sin so that it will never manifest again. You are Holy unto the Lord!!

Beautiful In Its Time

2010-09-10T14:26:00.005+03:00

I woke up this morning with a smile on my face enjoying the fact that the early morning sun was pouring into my apartment. I love sunny mornings! Shortly though, I got in a very strange mood where I began to feel disappointed and discouraged at God. I felt that he was moving too slowly and was not listening to me. Now that I think about it, I must be doing some serious damage to the devils camp for him to give me such an attack. Something must be happening in the heavenlies if that attack is anything to go by. There was a darkness and a heaviness in my heart that I was not understanding. I just kept praying over and over again for God to deliver me and I was really rebuking the devil. Then it hit me that I needed to tell God what I was feeling and so I began to pour out my heart to him. In the middle of all that I said "Now is my time!" and I put in some really crazy demands. You know, when you are busy ranting and raving the Lord just lets you finish then later it dawns on you how ridiculous you sounded!

When I was done the Lord said "Anything I do for you is only beautiful in its time." That hit me hard. It means that if it comes before or after its God ordained time it will cause havoc and not be a blessing. God being the awesome daddy that he is knows this and will not respond to my demands for "Now!" if that is not the right time. So once again I found myself at his feet. Begging forgiveness and laying down my demands, dreams, hopes and desires. All I can say is "let it be unto me according to your word and in your time." I pray for peace and victory in the waiting. I need that more than anything else at this time!!

Father to the Fatherless

2010-09-09T10:35:00.002+03:00

As I continue to pray that God would release me into my destiny, the Lord unfolded a different aspect of it yesterday. In all truth, I was not expecting this aspect of it to be part of the discussion. I had told God that I had entered rest where marriage was concerned and that I was never going to let it be a an issue between us. I had really began to slide into the thought that I would never be married and that it would be well with my soul. I have said it often to those around me that a man is not a need. I can live without one. But it would be good to have one. But delay is not denial!! Now I know (this is personal revelation) that if I remain single forever I will miss out on God's best for me. Yet for others, it may be that if they get married they will miss out on God's best for them. That is why I say it is personal.

The Lord led me into several prayers last night and this morning. He also asked me to put together a wish list where my man was concerned with instructions to put a seed and the list in an envelope and drop them at the altar on Sunday during the service. In the middle of my quiet time this morning I suddenly found myself missing my dad intensely. I remembered the day he came out of surgery. I remembered the day he told me that he was going to die. I remembered conversations we had in the past and how towards the end of his life he had become my confidant. I would ask for his advice and tell him what I was thinking of doing. If dad said no that was the end of it. If he said go ahead I knew that God had spoken. Many times when I was confused about what to do, or if I had two options that seemed right, I would ask God to speak through dad and whatever dad said to do is what I did. I was blessed every time. I miss that.

I remembered the day he died. I remembered his face and how my sister Gigi and I were the wailing women in the hospital. Gigi and I had such a special bond with dad. We knew without a doubt that he loved us. Even when we did crazy things and got ourselves into a mess. It was dad who always picked us out of our mire, provided solutions to our mess and punished us in love. He did not spare the rod. Not Dad!!! He would whack you good and then give you an added punishment just for effect. But his discipline was the life giving kind. His loss was very painful for me. However, I must say that God stepped in immediately to fill the gap. He became my Father in more ways than one. Even though I felt dad's loss I did not have a void or gaping hole within me. God filled up that spot immediately and by so doing preserved me in more ways than one.

This morning God showed me in the Bible of another person that had lost a parent and how God had stepped in to comfort him. Genesis 23-24 talks about the death of Sarah and how Abraham mourned and wept over her. Isaac was there too. Like me, he was weeping and mourning the loss of a parent that dotted over him, that encouraged him and loved him. After Abraham had buried her it is important to note that he saw a need in Isaac that he did not see in himself. Isaac did not realize that he needed a wife and he was 37 years old. He was probably saying like me that she was not a need but it would be good to have one. Yet his father, who represents God in this case, saw a need in his son and immediately knew that a wife would meet that need. So he sends his servant, who represents the Holy Spirit, on a matchmaking mission. He says to him "...get a wife for my son Isaac."

You know the story. The servant is successful and comes back with Rebekah in tow. Verse 67 of Genesis 24 gives the conclusion of the matter:

"Isaac brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he married Rebekah. So she became his wife, and he loved her; and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death."

The love between a man and a woman has a comforting effect in the death of a loved one. It is no wonder then that in this time of discussing my destiny God would think of my wholeness and would see a need in me that I have not even seen in myself. What a wonderful Father he is. God takes care of every need to ensure that you are whole in order to run with the destiny that he has in store for you. I am not deceived. I know that marriage is for destiny, but how wonderful to know that God wants to comfort me after my fathers death and to use a wonderful man of God to love on me like Christ loves the Church and to become a confidant and covering for me as surely as Dad was. I know in my spirit that even now the Holy Spirit is out on a matchmaking mission on my behalf for the word of the Lord says in Isaiah 34 :16

"Search from the Book of the Lord and read; Not one of these shall fail; Not one shall lack her mate. For my mouth has commanded it, and His Spirit has gathered them."

Deaf and Mute

2010-09-07T09:15:00.003+03:00

In Mark 7:33-35 we read about a man with a deaf and mute spirit. Still on the topic of the tongue it is obvious that if one cannot hear they cannot speak. If you cannot hear what God is saying, how can you speak what is right? Psalm 38:13 says:

¹³ I am like a deaf man, who cannot hear,

like a mute, who cannot open his mouth;

Jesus spoke in parables that had hidden meaning. The disciples asked him why he did this and his reply found in Mathew 13:13-14 says

¹³This is the reason that I speak to them in parables: because having the power of seeing, they do not see; and having the power of hearing, they do not hear, nor do they grasp and understand.

¹⁴In them indeed is ^]the process of fulfillment of the prophecy of Isaiah, which says: You shall indeed hear and hear but never grasp and understand; and you shall indeed look and look but never see and perceive.

The secrets of the Kingdom of God are for those who hear with their natural ears and then hear again with their spiritual ears. Hearing with your spiritual ears means that you grasp and you understand the secrets of God behind the natural words you are hearing. You have the power to hear the secrets of the Kingdom and those secrets when spoken by you bring deliverance, prosperity, healing and success in every area of your life.

I am amazed at the goodness of God. Two days, or so ago I was telling him to speak to me like he did with Moses. God testifies in Numbers 12 6-8

⁶And He said, Hear now My words: If there is a prophet among you, I the Lord make Myself known to him in a vision and speak to him in a dream.

⁷But not so with My servant Moses; he is entrusted and faithful in all My house.

⁸With him I speak mouth to mouth [directly], clearly and not in dark speeches; and he beholds the form of the Lord. Why then were you not afraid to speak against My servant Moses?

And again in Exodus 33:11 "And the Lord spoke to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend."

My hearts desire is that God will speak to me so that I can understand and grasp with my heart the mysteries of his Kingdom to walk in the ways he has ordained for me.

Mark 7 and Mark 9 record incidences when Jesus met with people who were deaf and mute and needed to be free of this condition. In Mark 9 a demon is causing the issue. It has blocked the boys hearing and stopped him from speaking. Moreover, it has on occasion thrown him the fire and in water so that it could kill him. A deaf and mute spirit has nothing for you but destruction and death. Does not the word of God say that the enemy comes only to steal, kill and destroy? When you are unable to grasp and understand the meaning of the word of the Lord you are unable to receive life to yourself. Why? Because Jesus said to the woman at the well, "these words that I speak to you, they are spirit and they are life." The words of the Lord are life. If you cannot truly hear what the Lord is saying you are dying.

The Lord looks at the boy and commands that deaf and mute spirit to depart which it promptly does. This of course throws off the disciples who had been doing the same thing in his name and had been unable to get this nasty spirit to leave. Jesus tells them that this kind, this particular breed, rank, caliber of spirit can only bow to prayer and fasting!! Wow!! Does that not just shed a whole new light to prayer and fasting?!! If you want the deaf and mute spirit to depart from you pray and fast then rebuke that spirit and send it packing!! This explains why when you are fasting you hear, grasp and understand what God is saying so clearly!!

The case in Mark 7 is different. We see no spirits here. This man, although deaf and mute, does not seem to be possessed by any devil. There is no deliverance service happening here. The process is quite simple:

³³After he took him aside, away from the crowd, Jesus put his fingers into the man's ears. Then he spit and touched the man's tongue. ³⁴He looked up to heaven and with a deep sigh said to him, "Ephphatha!" (which means, "Be opened!" ). ³⁵At this, the man's ears were opened, his tongue was loosened and he began to speak plainly.

Christ commands him to be opened. Immediately he can hear and immediately he can speak plainly.

These two instances tell me that one can have their spiritual hearing (and by default speaking) blocked by a demonic spirit or by God. Exodus 4:11

¹¹ The LORD said to him, "Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the LORD ?

However, the desire of God is that you hear and that you speak right. However, your hearing and your speaking is dictated by your heart. If your heart is calloused then you will see and will not perceive, you will hear but will not grasp and understand. The heart of God is that you will have your heart fixed so that you can truly see and truly hear. Jesus continues his discourse in Mathew 13:15 -16 and says:

¹⁵For this people's heart has become calloused;

they hardly hear with their ears,

and they have closed their eyes.

Otherwise they might see with their eyes,

hear with their ears,

understand with their hearts

and turn, and I would heal them. ¹⁶But blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.

Therefore spiritual hearing and seeing is about understanding the meaning of what you see and hear. Its a matter of the heart. Each one of us therefore needs a new heart according to Jeremiah 17, because the old heart is "deceitful above all things, and it is exceedingly perverse and corrupt and severely, mortally sick!" If you can allow God to fix your heart, by taking away the old one and giving you a new one you can then be able to understand with your heart what you see and hear. Once this is done you can begin to speak the word of the Lord and by so doing to make your way prosperous!

Father today I come into your presence as one who longs to see and hear and to communicate with you face to face. Father, I ask that you would give me a new heart. The kind that can perceive, grasp and understand the things that you are saying to me. Father, today in the name of Jesus I come against any deaf and mute spirit that could have been hindering me from clearly hearing what you are saying to me. I come against it in the name of Jesus and decree that in that mighty name I am free to hear what the Lord my God is saying to me and perceive what I see, to grasp and understand with my heart everything that I hear you say. Lord I put my fingers in my ears just like you did with the deaf man and I touch my tongue and command them in the name of Jesus "Be opened!" I thank you for opening my hearing and loosing my tongue. Lord God I touch my eyes too and command them to be opened in the name of Jesus. Yes Lord! Blessed are my eyes for they see and my ears for they hear clearly. Blessed I'm I for my heart perceives, grasps and understands the mysteries and secrets of the Kingdom of God. Lord, I worship you today for reaching out to me. You are the revealer of mysteries and you have chosen to reveal them to me. I bless you and honor you. In Jesus name I do pray. Amen!!

Milk and Honey are Under Your Tongue!

2010-09-07T08:24:00.003+03:00

I was praying before I started reading my Bible this morning and just as I was about to say Amen I felt that I was not done yet. So I began to worship the Lord and to pray in tongues. As I was doing so I could see in my minds eye flames on my tongue and a sword that went in and out of my mouth. As if my tongue was a sword going back and forth and a flame or tongue of fire was sitting on it.

James says that the tongue is a fire and like a small spark that can set a forest on fire so is the tongue. James says that the tongue is set on fire by hell and can cause much destruction. Then Isaiah 30:27 describes the tongue of God as a consuming fire. I realized that since we are created in the image of God our tongues also are a consuming fire. Everyone's tongue is a fire. The question becomes, who has lit the fire on your tongue?

This little thing in our mouth can bring both blessing and ruin to our lives. Consider that when the Lord wanted to bring ruin on the wicked he turned their tongues against themselves (Psalm 64:8). It is out of the abundance of the heart that the mouth (tongue) speaks. So when it comes to the tongue the change must start in the heart. As James says, no one can tame the tongue. The only way to get the tongue to fall in line with God's word and way of doing things is to get your heart fixed.

Psalm 39:3 says:

My heart grew hot within me,

and as I meditated, the fire burned;

then I spoke with my tongue:

What you meditate on in your heart fans the flame that lights your tongue so that you speak. Have you ever been really angry about something and you just wanted to tell off the person that had done you wrong but they were not around you? You meditate on what they did or said, you stew up good and the more you dwell on the issue the more the fire burns within you? Then the person shows up and you are just like a volcano waiting to erupt. You spew your hot lava out your mouth faster that they can digest it and they are looking at you all confused because you can't seem to hold back. Well, I've been there. Today God is telling me that if I am to say things that are in line with him and his word always, then I must meditate on this word and marinade it in my heart at all times. That way when I open my mouth to speak, only his word will come out.

Look at this words from Job 33:2-3

² I am about to open my mouth;

my words are on the tip of my tongue.

³ My words come from an upright heart;

my lips sincerely speak what I know.

When you open your mouth with the words ready at the tip of your tongue, you will speak from your heart and you say what you know!! What do you know? Listen to yourself speak. What is coming out of your mouth is what is in your heart. Whatever is in your heart is what you know. Do you need to change what you know?

If you are a marketplace Christian like me and have been called to take back the Kingdom's resources then you have a land to conquer. God gave Joshua direction on how to conquer the land in Joshua 1:8

⁸ Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.

The word of God is what you need to know. Read it to yourself out. Meditate and Marinade your heart in it all the time. Practice that word so that it becomes a part of you. Then you will naturally speak it and you will become prosperous and successful. Psalm 73:9 says:

⁹ Their mouths lay claim to heaven,

and their tongues take possession of the earth.

You posses with your tongue!!! It's no wonder then that the devil would seek to fill your tongue with negative things. With lies, destruction and evil. He knows that the way to take possession is with your tongue. Meditate on this word and let it sink deep into your spirit. Your tongue is your instrument for possessing the earth!!

Proverbs 18:21 says it clearly:

²¹ The tongue has the power of life and death,

and those who love it will eat its fruit

Don't speak death to that which concerns you, speak life. If your business is struggling find the word of God that speaks prosperity and success to the work of your hands and prophecy to your business before you begin working. If you are employed do the same. Begin to speak life. Tell your business that it shall live and not die according to the word of the Lord. Do you not realize that in Genesis Ch 1 the world was void and dark but the Spirit of the Most High God was hovering over the water, in that darkness just waiting for God to say "Let there be" so he could get busy? It is the same with you. You are made in the image and likeness of God. Begin to say "Let there be" and just like God you will then say "And it was so".

As I'm writing this God is giving me an example for us single people. We are to say:

"Let there be a husband (or wife) in my life for God has said in his word that none shall lack a mate and it is not good for man to be alone. His word has said that two are better than one and that from the beginning God made them two by two. He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor with the Lord. Therefore let the mate God has prepared for me show up in the name of Jesus!!"

Let that word marinade deep in your heart and it will be so.

Now, when I came across this next verse I was blown away. Song of Solomon 4:11 says this:

¹¹ Your lips drop sweetness as the honeycomb, my bride;

milk and honey are under your tongue...

It occurred to me that the Lord had said that he was taking his children to a land flowing with milk and honey. How then was it possible that milk and honey was under my tongue. Why under and not on my tongue? Under the tongue is a storage place. It is a place of hiding. When we were kids and were caught chewing gum in class I remember the teacher would ask you to open your mouth if you said you were not chewing. You would open your mouth and nothing was there. Meanwhile, the piece of gum was under your tongue. If milk and honey are under your tongue it means that the only way to partake of them is to get them from under there and onto your tongue.

If you want to partake of the good of the land, get the milk and honey from under your tongue. Begin to speak what the word of the Lord says about you, your family, the work of your hands and your health. Begin to speak it and you will find that the milk and honey will come from under your tongue so you can partake of it.

It's a Hostile Take Over!!!

2010-09-06T08:10:00.003+03:00

I have been going about this the wrong way. I'm sorry ya'll but the marketplace is about a hostile take over. Realize that the land you want is already occupied. Realize that the enemy has already set up camp there and has been there a long time. You cannot ask the powers of darkness to politely make room for you. You cannot make alliances with them. You must take it from them by force! The land you want is already occupied and God knows that. He never told you that he was going to give you a land that is lying fallow just waiting for you to come and take your place. NO!!

Exodus 13:5

When the LORD brings you into the land of the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Hivites and Jebusites—the land he swore to your forefathers to give you, a land flowing with milk and honey...

The land of your prosperity, the one that flows with milk and honey that you can't wait to get into is an occupied land. Realize if you want to go into telecoms that Safaricom, Zain, Orange, Telkom Kenya, Essar and the rest are already there. The business you are thinking of going into, the one that God has promised to give to you, exists in a land that is fully occupied by giants!! You have to make up your mind that you will dispossess the giants and take hold of that for which Christ laid a hold of you.

Do you know that the marketplace was God's idea? That he owns the marketplace as surely as he owns the cattle on a thousand hills? Do you know that the devil, knowing that the marketplace was the heart of the city took control of it so that he may take control of the resources of the earth? Wealth is made in the marketplace. The wealth of the wicked is not taking a walk from their camp to yours all by itself. You will not wake up off the prayer mat and be a millionaire. You must work. And the place where work takes place is called the marketplace. The channel that God has ordained for channeling the wealth of the wicked into your hands is called the marketplace. You must wake up in the morning and engage in the marketplace in order to increase in wealth. The Lord wants to channel the resources of the earth into your hands that you may favor his righteous cause and send the gospel all over his green earth.

The devil will not just put the wealth into your hand because you have shown up in the marketplace. It has to be a hostile take over. You must show up in the marketplace, scatter the powers of darkness that govern your industry and then take over by force in the name of Jesus!! Move over devil there's a new sheriff in town!! Take over your industry. Take over in the place where God has placed you. Take the industry by force. Take over the resources in that industry. Take over the business in that industry. Become a monopoly in your own right by the power of the Most High God. Don't let the giants intimidate you. Show up before the throne of God, power up and then go in this might of yours and take over the land. God shall enable you. Worship him today as the Man of War. The Warrior King. Worship him as the one who goes before you to hand over to you the treasures of darkness in secret places. Call God out. Tell him to put on his fighting gear, get on his chariot and ride ahead of you into battle. The good Lord enjoys a good fight!! Put on the full armor of God and go into battle for your industry. It's a hostile take over!!

Yeah!

2010-09-05T21:43:00.003+03:00

I found this little tidbit from a yahoo finance article titled "7 spending tips from frugal billionaires"

"Carlos Slim Helu (Carlos Slim), a telecom tycoon and billionaire with well-known frugal tendencies, has a net worth of $60.6 billion, according to Forbes. Assuming no changes in his net worth, he could spend $1,150 a minute for the next 100 years before he ran out of money. To put this in perspective, he could spend in 13 minutes what a minimum-wage earner brings home after an entire year of the daily grind."

Imagine that, then imagine that God wants to get you there and beyond. Then just give a loud shout "YEAH!!!!!"

Another Dream

2010-09-05T20:15:00.005+03:00

Last night was very interesting. I was watching some preaching and nodding off just before midnight and had a very interesting experience. I nodded off and was caught up in a strange dream where everything was shadows and I was in this car that was out of control and drove directly into the shadow of a man. I woke up fearful. I was so sleepy and realized that I had just nodded off. So I said a quick prayer and went right back to nodding off. I immediately went into another dream where there were 3 very beautiful ladies walking very purposefully towards me but their faces were demonic looking. Again I woke up terrified. This time I realized that the enemy was attacking me in my sleep. I grabbed some anointing oil that I keep beside my bed and anointed my forehead, rebuked the enemy and invited the Lord only to project dreams to me in my sleep. I then promptly went back to sleep.

I went into this dream where I was driving on this highway. I was very peaceful, calm and content as I drove. It was a beautiful highway and I was looking for my exit on the right. I got to the first right turn, looked at it and said "No, that's not my exit" then drove on. I was alone on this highway. There were no other cars or pedestrians on it. Looking up ahead I saw on my left a man who looked to have been hit by a car or something. Either way he was lying face down on the side of the road and he was dead. He was wearing a lime green shirt and either jeans or Khaki pants. I looked at him and thought to help but thought it may be dangerous. His shirt glowed strangely. Like it was alive even though he was dead. I slowed down then drove past. As I was driving I thought to myself, "maybe I should call the police" then immediately said to myself "No. I don't want to get involved with that" and kept on driving. Again I saw another turning in front of me to my right and as I came up to it, I realized that this was still not my exit. When I looked ahead of me I realized that the highway stretched out in front of me. I thought to myself "I guess my exit is farther up." Then I woke up.

I woke up knowing that this dream was significant but fearful at the same time. Looking at my watch I realized that it had only been about 20 minutes since I had fallen asleep. It entered my mind that Daniel had called God the interpreter of dreams. So I prayed that God who I was sure had given me this dream would also give me the interpretation. I immediately fell asleep again till morning. When I woke up in the morning God began to interpret the dream to me.

One thing you have to understand is that earlier on in the day God had spoken to me about the calling he has for my life. He has also been speaking to me about destiny and my purpose here on earth. One thing that I have now understood with greater depth is that I must be holy as he is holy so I can present myself before his throne on a daily basis to seek him and to worship him. This is the only way that he can then download to me the pattern for what he has in store for me. The last few days have been days of consecration and asking God to give me a new heart. In the process God has also spoken to me about my future and the changes I need to make. This dream was to clarify some things for me.

I realized that the highway I was traveling on was the highway of holiness. According to the word of the Lord, few travel on the highway of holiness. That is why I did not see anyone on it. It was also why I felt so peaceful, calm and content as I was driving. The car represented my life as I traveled on the highway of holiness and the exits I was looking for where in terms of the business decisions I had been asking God to help me make. I have been wanting to exit employment and focus on the business ideas God has given me but he was telling me that the time to exit was not yet. Isaiah tells us that whether we turn to the left of to the right, we shall hear a voice behind us saying this is the way, walk ye in it. God was telling me that the time to move out of employment to my own business was not yet. God is a God of times and seasons and he does not want you to move prematurely.

Then I asked God about the dead man on the road. He told me that that was the flesh. The flesh must die. I had been talking to God about killing my flesh earlier in the day. On the highway of holiness flesh must die and stay dead. Green is the color of life. Remember that the man was wearing a green shirt that glowed in such a way as to show that it had life in it? Well, that was to signify that if one is not careful as they travel the highway of holiness, the flesh can rise up again to bring about sin. The reason I got a check not to touch the man is because the flesh would have come alive again in me should I have touched that shirt that was alive due to the corruption of the flesh.

Jude vs 23 says "snatch others from the fire and save them; to others show mercy, mixed with fear—hating even the clothing stained by corrupted flesh."

Don't we serve an awesome God? In one dream he tells me to stay put, confirms to me that I am walking on the highway of holiness and instructs me to beware of the flesh. No wonder the devil was fighting me tooth and nail before God could give me the dream. I believe that in the spirit realm the enemy had seen the angel of the Lord standing by me getting ready to deliver the message and he was trying to make sure I didn't get it. Well, I have purposed to anoint my head with oil every night and welcome Jehovah to minister to me in dreams and night visions as I sleep. My God is good oooooohhhh!!

The 3rd Dimension

2010-09-02T23:09:00.004+03:00

I feel like I have never known God. This dimension is like nothing I have ever seen or heard yet I know that there is more to him. He is so much deeper than I can ever imagine. I have received an invitation to go into the cloud of his presence. Not just to sit here and strain for the light of his glory but to go into the cloud and like Moses, commune with him face to face. It is almost scary. I am in such awe of God! Now I understand Juanita Bynum's book "The Threshing Floor." There is a level in God where you approach with care. Where you make sure you are clean and you have your priestly garments on. This is the third realm. The Holy of Holies.

Today I have received revelation on two things:

1) That my highest calling is to come into his presence every day and to bow before him and worship him. I must make time for this regardless of my schedule. I must give him the first part of my day, when I am still bright and fresh ready to hear what he has to say.

2) That the work of my hands is really his work. His project. He has just commissioned me to oversee it for him much in the same way that Moses oversaw the building of the tabernacle, or Solomon the first temple.

It has been a journey to this third dimension of doing business. At first business was a carnal undertaking, then I realized that this was my calling. However, even then, it was MY business and I gave to God a percentage of the profits. I owned the business. Today he said, "The businesses are mine. You work for me. You have nothing of your own. You are only a steward of what I put you over, for the earth is mine and the fullness thereof."

I repent in dust and ashes for usurping your place oh Lord. Forgive my ignorance and renew my mind in this area.

Needless to say I have handed it all to him. He is the owner. I make no major decision without first talking to him. I meet with him every morning for his direction and the way forward. He is my Lord and I have no other. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

They Exchanged The Truth Of God For A Lie

2010-09-02T10:52:00.003+03:00

Last night Dr. Wanda Turner preached a most powerful sermon at the Woman of Distinction Convention where she shared from her life. One of the most important and note worthy things she said is that what you are going through may not even be about you. It could be for someone else that you may know how to encourage them or to give them sound godly advice from experience. This morning I began to realize that my single hood was one such situation. How will they know that God can keep a single girl and prosper her without the help of a man, when so many women think of a man as their way out of a bad situation?

Further, I began to inquire of the Lord regarding my preservation. I'm not sure if I have ever shared this before, but I am a Virgin. I have never had sex. And yes, I will be 34 this month. I used to think that I had kept myself because I would say No at all the right times. This morning God showed me that his hand had been on me. That it was he who enabled me to escape the situations that others have faced. How do I explain that no one ever molested me as a child, that I was never raped even when I walked home alone in the dark? How do I explain saying No every single time with my boyfriends and never giving in even when the pressure was intense from him and my body? Or when in my riotous stage of life I went out drinking and clubbing and still came home in one piece? That was the hand of God on my life. I didn't keep myself a virgin. God kept me and I will praise his name forever more.

Funny enough, having made it through all that, I am now faced with a different kind of pressure. Society does not expect a woman of my age who has a great career to still be a virgin. Most people look at me like they can't figure out what I am waiting for. Others point out my age and tell me to hurry up and at least have a baby. The pressure is crazy. Then a few years ago the devil decided to add his own kind of pressure when I developed uterine fibroids and had to undergo uterine surgery. My Doctor looked at me and said I had about 5 years to have a baby or else the fibroids may recur and who knows how that would go? That devil is a liar!!! The pressure to go out and have sex is intense and in some cases the reasons look valid.

But what shall it benefit me to gain the whole world and lose my soul? Would I risk my soul for momentary pleasure or for a baby? When I stand before God what shall I say if I fornicate? No. Nothing is worth my saviors frown. Even if I never have sex or children I will not go against my saviors will. Today, I repented for thinking that I had preserved myself. God alone has preserved me and that for a reason that he will reveal in due time. I told him how people make virgins (especially older ones) feel out of order for refusing to indulge and asked him why it is so. He responded by sending me to Romans 1:25 the first part of that sentence reads as follows:

"They exchanged the truth of God for a lie..."

If you are still a virgin regardless of your age, stay that way until you are married. This is the will of God concerning you. Those who try to urge you into sexual sin have exchanged the truth of God for a lie. Do not join them in their futility. Romans 1: 22 - 32 reads:

²²Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools ²³and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals and reptiles.

²⁴Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. ²⁵They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen.

²⁶Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones (Lesbianism). ²⁷In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men (Homosexuality), and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.

²⁸Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done...

³²Although they know God's righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them.

If you have not had sex yet, stay hidden in Christ. If you have already had sex outside of marriage repent and let the Spirit of God give you the strength to abstain. Retain the knowledge of God and the wisdom of God that you may be preserved. Even sex is for destiny and purpose!!

Do NOT Lean On Wealth!

2010-09-01T07:11:00.003+03:00

Psalm 100:3 says

"Know that the LORD is God.

It is he who made us, and we are his;

we are his people, the sheep of his pasture."

God made us and because of that he knows us more than we know ourselves. God knows the heart of man. He knows what we can handle and what we can't. His law is for our preservation. We should therefore embrace it.

Isaiah 2:7-9 says

⁷ Their land is full of silver and gold;

there is no end to their treasures.

Their land is full of horses;

there is no end to their chariots.

⁸ Their land is full of idols;

they bow down to the work of their hands,

to what their fingers have made.

⁹ So man will be brought low

and mankind humbled—

do not forgive them.

These were a blessed people. They had food to eat, great wealth amassed and kept but it was all to their destruction. Anyone to whom wealth is entrusted by God, must first understand the reason for this wealth. The wealth of the wicked will not be given to those who do not know its purpose. Nor will it be given to those who just want to hoard it and say "See how good God has been to me." The wealth of the wicked will only be given to those who will favor the righteous cause of the Lord. Therefore renew your mind where this matter is concerned. That God may entrust you, first with true riches of the Kingdom and then secondly with material wealth.

In the passage above we see a group of people who were blessed of the Lord. However, they did not understand that wealth in the hands of the righteous was to fulfill the cause of Jehovah. As such they amassed for themselves great wealth and their hearts were turned away from God to this wealth. They began to worship it and to bow down to the work of their hands. There is real danger of the heart turning away from God to wealth, if you amass it for yourself!!

In the book of Deuteronomy 17: 14 - 20 we find Moses giving Israel instructions on what to do when they get to their promised land. The land of their destiny. He instructs the King thus:

¹⁶ "The king, moreover, must not acquire great numbers of horses for himself or make the people return to Egypt to get more of them, for the LORD has told you, "You are not to go back that way again." ¹⁷ He must not take many wives, or his heart will be led astray. He must not accumulate large amounts of silver and gold."

Why does God say this? Because he understands the power of great amounts of wealth to turn the heart of man from God. Does this mean that we should be poor? Not at all!! God himself delights in the prosperity of his saints! He wants to put vast amounts of money into our hands not just so our bank accounts can read in the Gazillions, but so that we can feed the hungry, clothe the naked, educate children, help the widow and the orphan. It is so that we can be his channel to reach the unreached and to demonstrate his love and care for humanity on the earth.

Look at what a King was to do to safeguard his heart and the reign of his generations:

¹⁸ "When he takes the throne of his kingdom, he is to write for himself on a scroll a copy of this law, taken from that of the priests, who are Levites. ¹⁹ It is to be with him, and he is to read it all the days of his life so that he may learn to revere the LORD his God and follow carefully all the words of this law and these decrees ²⁰ and not consider himself better than his brothers and turn from the law to the right or to the left. Then he and his descendants will reign a long time over his kingdom in Israel."

The King was to handwrite for himself on a scroll the whole law of God. That ensured that he read it word for word and internalized it. Psychologists have proven that there is a connection between reading something and then writing it down and how well the brain absorbs and remembers it. Then he is to keep the scroll with him and read it daily all the days of his life!!! This is the way to preserve your soul when the wealth of the wicked comes into your hands. Read the word of God day in and day out. Make notes. Internalize the word. Let it go deep into your spirit and deep into the chore of your heart. Then you will revere the Lord your God and will follow his laws in humility not thinking yourself better than your brothers.

On day one of this wonderful month of September I have understood that:

It endangers my soul to hoard for myself great wealth and not use it for the Kingdom of God.
That this word of God must be my protection. I must read it and meditate on it especially when I walk in the kind of money God has ordained for me, that my soul may be preserved.

I leave you with this very sobering thought found in Isaiah 1:31:

That if you insist on hoarding and are led astray to worship wealth and the work of your hands

"The mighty man will become tinder

and his work a spark;

both will burn together,
with no one to quench the fire."

September - My Month of Travail and Birthing Destiny

2010-09-01T06:27:00.002+03:00

In the animal kingdom when the time comes for an animal to give birth we often see them retreat to a secret place where they travail until that which they have been carrying within them is birthed. During this time they do not eat or socialize. They focus on the duty at hand. I sense that the time has come for me to travail until I birth destiny. In this month of September I have heard God asking me to come away with him, just like he told Moses, that I too may travail and birth my destiny in God. The things we will be dealing with are as follows:

The condition of my heart - Do I have a new heart? One that has set its affections on God alone?
The Book of Isaiah - I sense strongly that God wants to open this book up to me so that I get it and walk in the mysteries there in.
Release into my Destiny and Purpose - My time has come!

I will therefore be blogging about this things most of all in this month. You are welcome to take the journey of discovery with me.

I want to point out that this month of September is the 9th month of the year. A human baby is carried to term within 9 months and is then birthed. I am therefore not surprised that God has called me into the secret place to be with him at this time. As I fast and seek his face like Moses on the mountain, I am expecting divine visitations, direction for the next season of my life, wisdom to navigate that season and increased anointing for the work set before me. When this season is done, I expect that the glory of the Lord will have been transfered onto me from exposure so that my face shines like Moses' face. He is a good God.

The interesting thing is that I feel a need to record this season on this blog. When I think of it I am not quite so surprised because often we see in the Bible the Lord asking his people to write down the visions, visitations and what he shares with them. I look forward to this month, this season and what God has in store for me. Keep me in your prayers. God bless!

We Shall Fulfill Destiny and NOT Let God Down!

2010-08-26T10:54:00.004+03:00

Over the past few years I have become increasingly aware of the fact that I am gifted much like Joseph and Daniel in the Bible. I am gifted as an administrator to foresee a problem and to plan how to mitigate against it. Not strangely, God speaks to me in visions and dreams and I have been blessed enough to interact with the trinity in various visions. I have always known that this was not the order of the day for most people and that the assignment on my life was great. But true to Gods nature, he has revealed things to me one step at a time in the journey of my life.

God unveils mysteries and one of the mysteries he unveiled to me this morning is found in Ps 139. As I sought him for direction and clarity in the calling over my life he spoke the truth of this psalm to my spirit. God knows me intimately. More than I know myself. He understands my thought processes, the desires of my heart and their root causes and before a word even enters my mind he knows what I will say and how I will react. He knows me intimately. He knows my innermost being. He sees and knows my spirit, soul and this shell I call my body. Nothing by passes him at any one moment. When it comes to me (and indeed the whole universe) God is all-knowing. That boggles my mind because I don't know myself the way that he does.

Today he reminded me of the Angelina Jolie movie 'Salt' that I watched recently. In this movie, children are groomed to become spies and murderers for Russia. They are taught, day after day. They are told what grades they will get, which schools they will go to, what they will study and where they will work. They are positioned with care and no amount of time is too much to ensure that they will do their job when the time comes. Later as adults, they take their place and do their thing for Russia. God said that this is exactly what happens to humans before they are birthed into this earth.

Psalm 139:13-17 reads as follows:

¹³ For you created my inmost being;

you knit me together in my mother's womb.

¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

your works are wonderful,

I know that full well.

¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you

when I was made in the secret place.

When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

¹⁶ your eyes saw my unformed body.

All the days ordained for me

were written in your book

before one of them came to be.

¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!

How vast is the sum of them!

These verses speak of the time before one comes to the earth. It says that God created my innermost being before forming my outer body in my mothers womb. This innermost being is the spirit and the soul of man. These he made before he even joined the ovum and sperm that later became you. Then David praises God saying that he is fearfully and wonderfully made. This means that the makeup of man is awe inspiring! Not just his physical body but his spirit and his soul. Your soul is your intellect, your will, your emotions. It is the seat of knowledge and wisdom. Your spirit is the part of you that is like God. That is why the Bible says that we are made in the image and likeness of God. That is your spirit. It is the place where God resides within you. In John 14 Jesus said that He, the Holy Spirit and the Father would come and live in man. This is where they live inside of you.

Before you came to the earth God gave you instructions, just like the young Evelyn Salt was directed in the movie. He told you who you were, he told you where you would study and what. He explained to you where you would work in the future and how you would be positioned to accomplish your destiny. God explained your destiny to you so that when you came to earth, you could connect in the Spirit realm with his Spirit who would remind you all these things step by step. That is why you can be in college and feel that the major you have taken up is wrong for you. Or why you can be at a job and even though you are excelling it feels wrong. All these things were told to you and then they were written in a book with your name on it that God keeps.

In the book of Revelation John talks about the day of judgment. Daniel does too. They talk about the thrones being brought out, court is in session and "the books were opened." This book. Your book. Will be among those books that will be opened. God will go through the book that had your assignment in it and judge you based on that assignment. This creates an urgency in my spirit to know what the book says about me at this time. What should I be doing? Where should I be working? Should I be working on my Masters or not? Is that in the book for this season I am in? Every single day ordained for me was written before the ovum and sperm even joined together to begin forming my physical body.

In the movie "Salt" Angelina Jolie (AKA Evelyn Salt) falls in love and marries which was absolutely not in the plan. When the time comes to fulfill her destiny she fouls up the plan. She gets caught up in all this other things and fails to perform. These distractions are what I like to think of as "noise." When you are listening to the radio you have to tune into the right wavelength in order to catch the signal clearly. If you are on the wrong frequency you may hear a word here and there, but there is a lot of noise interfering with the signal. Until you get to the right wavelength, you will not be able to clearly hear what the announcer/presenter is saying.

As one sent from above you have to tune in to heavens wavelength in order to eliminate noise and hear clearly the instructions relayed to you by your base commander, the Holy Ghost. If you are not on this wavelength you will be distracted by the things you see and hear on the earth. You will experience fog and confusion because you cannot see clearly for all the things that are in front of you. In order to avoid clouding and confusion, you must be able to interpret everything you see and hear on the basis of your destiny. Basically, you must keep asking yourself the question "Is this in the original plan of God for my life?" If not, you must walk away from it however good it may look.

Everything in your life must be held up against the mirror of the book of your life. It must pass through the sieve of your destiny. If it is not in alignment with the plan of God for your life, the plan in the book by which you will be judged, you need to walk away from it. It is only noise and will cloud your ability to hear clearly. The promise of God is Isaiah 30:21 "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." That voice is constantly speaking. Constantly telling you the way to the accomplishment of your destiny and it is the voice of the Spirit of the Most High God, your counselor. If you are not hearing his voice, you need to tune in to heavens frequency and eliminate any noise in your life.

One thing you need to understand is that when God sent you to earth having given you your assignment he was confident that you could accomplish it. He put everything in you that you needed for your destiny. Not only that, but he was confident of your obedience too. God never put you on earth thinking to himself "Cross my fingers and hope for the best!" Philemon 1:21 speaks of Paul's confidence in those to whom he was writing:

"Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I ask."

This is God's attitude towards you. When he sends his word to you he does so confident of your obedience knowing that you will go the extra mile for him. God has so much confidence in mankind. In spite of all our faults God still looks at us and says we are the people for the job. He sent his own son, as a man, to show us that it can be done. Like him, we too can fulfill our destinies and accomplish that for which God called us. Like him, when our final hour comes we shall be able to say "It is finished" and release our spirits back to the one who created us victorious. We shall go back empty. Having released all that is within us in the accomplishment of our destinies in God. He is confident that we can do it. He is confident of our obedience. We shall not let him down!!

Curious Dream

2010-08-24T12:46:00.004+03:00

I had a dream the morning sunday the 22nd of August and that dream is really messing with my head.

I was somewhere in space and directly in front of me was the sun shining brightly. Its rays were reaching out to me so that it could enfold me in them. To my left I could see a sky blue flag but it was not the flag of any nation that I know. It was partially turned towards the sun taking in its rays as well. Just a little bit ahead of it and to its left side was a planet. I have no idea why, but I think this is the planet earth. It too was angled in such a way as to take in as much light as possible from the sun. On my right, up ahead, directly aligned to the planet on my left was another planet. It was angled so as to get as much sunshine as it could. Behind it, directly aligned to it was the moon. I could see the craters on the moon and even though there was a little light it was covered in darkness. The planet in front of it stopped the sun's rays from getting to the moon. Then I heard the words "When you repent of sins, your prayers come up to me and I forgive that sin." On my right side, close to me I saw a dove. It was black with the sin of the world and it was flapping its wings. This dove took the sins of the world away as prayers to God and he would forgive mankind.

I can't figure out what this means. I don't know if it was just an FYI dream or God was passing a message to me. All I remember was all these planets and the flag turned towards the sun trying to get some light. Right now my thinking is that the sun was not really the sun but the glory of God. That light that existed on the first day of creation and not the sun created on the fourth day. I also believe that light, is the same light that illuminates the new Jerusalem so that there is no need for sunlight. I believe that was the shekinah glory of God.

I believe that the flag represented the Nations of the earth. How everyone desires for the light of God's glory. Those who know that that is what they are looking for and those who have no idea what they are searching for. It made me think of plants planted in a dark room and the only light comes from a hole in the wall. All these plants will turn and bend towards that light. That light is life. The Bible says in John 1

"¹In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ²He was with God in the beginning.

³Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. ⁴In him was life, and that life was the light of men. ⁵The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood^{a]" style="font-size: 0.75em; line-height: 0.5em; ">[a]} it."

Creation recognizes this true light, but humans, created in the image of the only true God do not. How sad!

The one planet was earth and it was reaching for the light too. Straining to receive as much exposure to God's glory as possible. Romans 8 says:

^"19 For the earnest expectation of the creation eagerly waits for the revealing of the sons of God. ²⁰ For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it in hope; ²¹ because the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. ²² For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now."

I am yet to figure out what the other planet was and why there was an occultation of the moon. I will have to keep praying and blogging till I find the answer.

Masters...

2010-08-23T20:02:00.002+03:00

I majored in biology and minored in psychology. At the time, I was pretty sure I wanted to study medicine. However, that MCAT proved too much for me so I tried the school of nursing and was accepted for a Masters in Nursing. Unfortunately, I could not afford to pay for it and they had no scholarships for me. At that time I felt so lost, but God had plans for me and he told me to come back home.

I had put in about 2 years of hospital experience at the time and when I came back home I went into call centers for some reason. Once again at the time I was not able to decipher where God was going with all this. A few years later, I am the MD of an HIV management company. I have put in a year in this field and will continue doing my thing as God allows.

The funny thing now is that we are talking about e-solutions for peer education to manage HIV and other wellness issues. Who knew that we could combine the two? My experience is just perfect for this field.

The other day I was talking to someone about how much I had wanted to study an MPH and tropical diseases and how it had backfired in my face. As I spoke, something in me began to wake up. All these years I have been struggling with which Masters to take. I felt that I needed and desired one, but I couldn't figure out which. Everyone thought I should take an MBA because I was so into management, but I was never cut out for that. Nothing else appealed to me. Then last year I thought I would study peace and conflict resolution and that too did not feel right. God made sure I couldn't take it. But this MPH... This has me kicking into action. I believe this is finally the one.

Lord knows I need to make up my mind and get to it!!

Laughter as Warfare

2010-08-12T12:08:00.004+03:00

Today during my time with the Lord he asked me to laugh at the enemy. I found that very strange initially but soon I was laughing pretty good. Then I found in his word where God laughs at the enemy:

Psalm 2:4

The One enthroned in heaven laughs;

the Lord scoffs at them.

and again:

Psalm 59:8

But you, O LORD, laugh at them;

you scoff at all those nations.

and yet again:

Psalm 37:13

but the Lord laughs at the wicked,

for he knows their day is coming.

God uses laughter as a weapon to put the devil in his place. To remind him that he can do all in his power but in the end he will still fail. One thing we have to understand about the devil is that even when he wins he has still lost because the blood of Jesus can make it all right again and because in the end, he has a reserved place in the lake of fire. What a relief for us who are born again. It does not matter how badly you have sinned or been involved with the enemy, Jesus can wash away your sin, guilt and reproach and make you white as snow. Then safe under the wings of the Lord you can point at the enemy and together with God laugh at him knowing his end.

Don't let the devil intimidate you. When he tries to, you go ahead and laugh at him. Laugh hard and long and let him know that your God is mighty to save and he never sleeps nor slumbers. It is well with your soul. Go on now. Have a good laugh at the devils expense!!

Freedom of the Mind!

2010-08-05T07:55:00.005+03:00

This morning I got up to read my Bible and the pages just fell open to Proverbs Chapter 4. My eyes fell on the title "Wisdom is Supreme." I said a prayer and began reading it. Then I heard the Lord say to me "First Worship me, so that your spirit can open up and be receptive to my word." So I began to do that. As I began to worship I began to see the picture of a large spider sitting on the top of my forehead. Its long legs came down to just above my eyes and the rest covered my brain. Clearly it had made its home here and had spread a web all over my brain. My brain was so covered in web, it looked like it was wrapped up in clear nylon wrap.

I immediately began to pray and rebuke that spirit. I prayed for my brain and my mind not fully understanding why this spirit was attacking my mind. After I had prayed, I felt a real physical freedom, like my mind exhaled and was free for the first time in a long time. Then God began to remind me of the vision I had a few years ago where I was taken up to heaven and the Spirit of God lay his hand on my forehead and imparted wisdom to me. This spider spirit had come to ensure that the wisdom God had imparted on me would not be my portion.

As I continued praying for my mind the words "Frontal Lobe" kept coming to mind. First, the Holy Spirit had laid his hand on my forehead where the frontal lobe is located. Secondly, the spider was sitting on this same lobe. So I did a small study on the functions of the frontal lobe and this is what I discovered:

The front part of frontal lobe is involved in planning, organizing, problem solving, selective attention, personality and a variety of executive functions or “higher cognitive functions” including behavior and emotions
It is responsible for the enthusiasm and drive, social nerves, behavior, reaction to varying situations, capacity to plan ahead and the occupation of skills in language.
The executive functions of the frontal lobes involve the ability to recognize future consequences resulting from current actions, to choose between good and bad actions (or better and best), override and suppress unacceptable social responses, and determine similarities and differences between things or events. Therefore, it is involved in higher mental functions.
The frontal lobes are involved in motor function, problem solving, spontaneity, memory, language, initiation, judgement, impulse control, and social and sexual behavior.
Front part of the brain; involved in planning, organizing, problem solving, selective attention, personality and a variety of "higher cognitive functions" including behavior and emotions.

With my calling in business these are all the skills I need to become extraordinary in my field. This nasty spirit was inhibiting all that. And guess what? The frontal lobe also has executive function meaning that it acts as a command center for other cognitive (mental) processes. It sends messages and inhibits or overrides others.

The executive functions are often invoked when it is necessary to override responses that might otherwise be automatically elicited by stimuli in the external environment. For example, on being presented with a potentially rewarding stimulus, such as a tasty piece of chocolate cake, a person might have the automatic response to take a bite. However, where such behaviour conflicts with internal plans (such as having decided not to eat chocolate cake while on a diet), the executive functions might be engaged to inhibit that response.

Basically, where naturally you would conform to the image of this world, the executive functions of the frontal lobe kick in so that you don't do what the world expects of you. Instead, you reach into the word of God in your spirit and override the natural instincts so you can do what God would have you do. Transformation, by the renewing of your mind!!!!

Some of those functions include:

Those that involve planning or decision making.
Those that involve error correction or troubleshooting.
Situations where responses are not well-rehearsed or contain novel sequences of actions.
Dangerous or technically difficult situations.
Situations that require the overcoming of a strong habitual response or resisting temptation

This is everything one has to deal with in business and that I am currently facing. I thank God for a mind that is free to receive his wisdom in every one of these situations. Now I can be an even greater light to my generation. God is awesome!!

Do NOT Conform Any Longer

2010-07-28T20:15:00.004+03:00

Romans 12:2

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

I have read that verse many times before. I have heard preachers expound on it on various topics but I have never heard it, the way I did today. Today the Spirit of God spoke to me loud and clear as I studied money and giving and said just that first part of the verse.

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world..."

I heard it as a command. I am no longer to think about money the way the world does. I am no longer to handle money the way the world does. I am to look to God for guidance on how to think and handle finances. The New living translation puts the second part of that sentence as follows:

"...but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think."

I must let him transform me. I must let him change my thought process. I must yield to God if I am to excel in the grace of giving. It is a radical place to be. A radical way to live. To those who are perishing it is foolishness, but to those who are looking to eternal life, this is pure wisdom and light.

May the God of all light illuminate our hearts, spirits, souls and minds so that we are transformed by him in our thinking and in our attitudes towards money and giving. And from today we conform no longer. We stop thinking about finances the way this world does and take a new approach. A Jesus approach.

Getting Our Minds Straight!

2010-07-27T18:31:00.004+03:00

Yesterday I mentioned that I felt as if I had just been sucked into God's Gulf Stream current and that he was carrying me swiftly along with him as he went about his business. I am learning about another dimension of giving that goes beyond anything I have ever known. Until now I thought I was a giver, but looking at the Bible I find others who out gave me by much. My heart is now crying out to God for the grace of giving. Oh, that I may excel in the grace of giving!

God has called each one of us that is in the marketplace and strategically placed us where we are so that he can direct the wealth of the wicked into our hands through commerce. But what is the purpose of this wealth? Is it just so that we may live large and eat well and say "This is how the Lord honors those that love him!" I think not. I believe that God wants to bring this wealth into our hands so that we can make his world right again. We must have the mindset that the money belongs to him, and that we are only managers of his silver and his gold.

Haggai 2:8

'The silver is mine and the gold is mine,' declares the LORD Almighty.

That said, we must therefore look at the work of our hands as a ministry. This is our calling. This is our ministry and we are anointed for it. The word anointing means "set aside for divine use" that means that we have been set aside for the holy use of the Lord in the marketplace.

Many times I have shared with you the scriptures found in Isaiah 45:1-7 and have told you often that this is my mandate in life. However, I have never fully understood how God intended to give me the "hidden treasures in secret places." Further, he says that he will set open doors before me so that gates are not shut. I just couldn't figure out how he was going to do that. Until yesterday. Finally, my eyes were opened. I felt like this person who had been staring at a wall, trying to find the secret passageway that led to the treasure. I knew that there was a secret passageway, but I just couldn't find it. So I stood there and just kept staring at the wall and asking God to reveal it.

Well, I found the secret passage way. Here it is:

Understanding that I am the steward and God is the owner of all the wealth he puts in my hand. Therefore I must always seek him for direction on HOW TO SPEND IT.

Understanding that he puts it in my world so that I can transform the world around me and make Christ known. Wealth is for spiritual and social transformation.

Understanding that this world is not my home and therefore this is not where I should pile my treasures. My treasures must be piled up in heaven where rust and moth cannot destroy.

Once you begin to get this concept, you will feel yourself sucked into God's current and the light bulb will go on in you as well.

Entering God's Current

2010-07-26T18:37:00.006+03:00

I don't even know where to begin. In the next few days, maybe weeks, I will be blogging on giving more than usual. God is shedding so much light in that area. I am seeking more knowledge and wisdom in the area of giving because I know that if I can set my mind right, all these things shall be added unto me. And not just that, but I will be piling up for myself treasures in heaven, where moth and rust cannot destroy.

I have heard it said before, "Find out where God is working and join him there" but I have never fully understood it. Jesus also said In Jn 5:17 "My Father is always at his work to this very day, and I, too, am working." I have always wondered what that meant, and where exactly is God working and how can I join him. God is shedding light on that as well. We serve a mighty God. An awesome God who allows us to work with him on projects that are bigger than ourselves.

I feel like I have entered the current of the Lord. In the movie "Finding Nemo" all the sea creatures are migrating and little Nemo is swimming his little fins off when finally they get to the gulf stream undersea current and everyone stops flapping their fins. They just relax and let the current carry them effortlessly to where they are going. I feel like I have entered God's current and he is now carrying me effortlessly and swiftly to where I need to be. I will explain this as I move forward.

Giving is the Key. Giving is the true mark of a follower of Jesus Christ. If you say you love Jesus and are not a giver, you need to re-evaluate your salvation. Sela!

Without Spot or Wrinkle

2010-07-23T07:45:00.003+03:00

You wake up in the morning and put on a spotless white gown or suit. It is beautifully ironed. Not a wrinkle to be found. Then you open the door and step out into a muddy, filthy slum. You walk through it all day, interacting with its people. A handshake here, a hug there, a quick kiss on the top of a chubby baby's head who has just come from being fed. Half the food is on his face and hands. Someone offered you a seat in a little mud hut and you sat a minute to speak words of kindness. At the end of the day you go home happy, but exhausted. You have accomplished much. One look in the mirror and it is obvious where you have been. Your white clothes are now full of spots and wrinkles. There is smudge of baby food on your chest where that baby touched you when you kissed his head. Some mud must have splashed on the bottom of your gown. Either way, you need to have it washed.

The Lord is ministering to my heart about righteous people whom he has saved, dressed in white and then sent out into a filthy world to be Christ to the people and fishers of men. As long as you are in this world, spots and wrinkles are inevitable. Getting downright filthy and wallowing in sin is rebellion, but a wrinkle here and a spot there are inevitable. As long as you know how to get them out.

Ephesians 5:25 - 27 states:

²⁵Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her,

²⁶So that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word,

²⁷That He might present the church to Himself in glorious splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such things [that she might be holy and faultless].

Keeping yourself holy and blameless is not possible all by yourself. There must be a reliance on the blood of Jesus that washes white as snow, as well as the washing of water with God's word.

I therefore admonish you with Peter the apostle:

2 Peter 3:14

"So then, dear friends, ... make every effort to be found spotless, blameless and at peace with him"

Stay in God's word and ask God repeatedly to wash you with the blood of his lamb Jesus. Make every effort to be found without spot or wrinkle!

FROM THIS DAY ONWARD, I WILL BLESS YOU

2010-07-22T21:50:00.011+03:00

I never cease to be amazed at the goodness of God. That he would care enough to tell his children what he is doing even before he does it. He is a good God and my soul shall ever praise him. This year has been amazing for me and my Church, Jubilee Christian Church. Why do I say that? Because God moved us to another level. The level of ownership. As we made the shift from the Ngara location to the Forest Road location, I saw that this transition was happening in the Spirit for many in the congregation as well. We were asked to give towards the purchase and renovation of the building, and many of us pledged to give whatever one agreed with God to give. It was an awesome time for any true son and daughter of the house.

We should have expected it, but many did not. Soon thereafter our finances were attacked seriously. Most people I know were struggling to bring in their pledges, but kept believing God anyway. I know that many have given to the building of God’s house sacrificially this last few months. Many, myself included, have fallen behind in our giving, but we are still committed to completing what we started. We shall not stop now. Building God a house has always been accompanied by demonic attack. Nehemiah and Ezra can testify to this. However, even though often there were delays, the work was always seen to completion because God was with his people. It is the same with us today.

The book of Haggai is only two chapters long but such a blessing at this time. It contrasts a period when the Israelites did not heed the call to build God’s house, and when they did. Chapter 1 opens up with God rebuking the people who were living large while the house of God was in ruin. God had cursed the work of their hands. The labor they put in was not equivalent to the output.

“ 6You have sown much, but you have reaped little; you eat, but you do not have enough; you drink, but you do not have your fill; you clothe yourselves, but no one is warm; and he who earns wages has earned them to put them in a bag with holes in it…

9You looked for much [harvest], and behold, it came to little; and even when you brought that home, I blew it away. Why? says the Lord of hosts. Because of My house, which lies waste while you yourselves run each man to his own house [eager to build and adorn it].

10Therefore the heavens above you [for your sake] withhold the dew, and the earth withholds its produce.

11And I have called for a drought upon the land and the hill country, upon the grain, the fresh wine, the oil, upon what the ground brings forth, upon men and cattle, and upon all the [wearisome] toil of [men's] hands”.

When these people heard the word of the Lord, they turned their hearts to him in repentance and he, being the darling he is sent word that he was with them. So their hearts were stirred and they built God a house. Just like we at JCC have been busy doing and continue to do.

Chapter 2 begins to describe the changes that God was bringing to their lives even as they built the house of God. He promised them that as they built his house he would be with them and that his Spirit would be in their midst. And then he added something else to it:

6For thus says the Lord of hosts: Yet once more, in a little while, I will shake and make tremble the [starry] heavens, the earth, the sea, and the dry land;

7And I will shake all nations and the desire and the precious things of all nations shall come in, and I will fill this house with splendor, says the Lord of hosts.

8The silver is Mine and the gold is Mine, says the Lord of hosts.

9The latter glory of this house [with its successor, to which Jesus came] shall be greater than the former, says the Lord of hosts; and in this place will I give peace and prosperity, says the Lord of hosts.

God was saying that as they built his house, he was going to shake the earth and bring the wealth of the Nations to them. All the precious things and desired things in the earth shall come to the house of the Lord. To his people. The silver is his and so is the gold and as we are building him a house he is shaking the earth to ensure that the wealth of the wicked is brought to his children who are mindful of his honor and glory. There shall be peace and prosperity. We shall know what it means to have the shalom of God. Nothing missing and nothing broken! It is our portion as we build God a house. Blessed be the name of the Lord. The glory of this end time Church, shall be greater than that of the first church because God shall send his glory on us in a mighty way.

I hear these words distinctly in my spirit today:

15And now, I pray you, consider what will happen from this day onward. Since the time before a stone was laid upon a stone in the temple of the Lord, how have you fared?

16Through all that time [the harvests have not fulfilled expectations, for] when one has gone expecting to find a heap [of sheaves] of twenty measures, there were but ten; when he has gone to the wine vat to draw out fifty bucketfuls from the press, there were only twenty.

Vs 16 has been true for me on so many levels and my heart has been crying out to the Lord to bless me indeed, so that the expectations I have are fulfilled and even exceeded. There is a change in the Atmosphere!!!

18Consider, I pray you, from this day onward, from the twenty-fourth day of the ninth month, even from the day that the foundation of the Lord's temple was [re]laid, consider this:

19Is the harvested grain any longer in the barn? As to the grapevine, the fig tree, the pomegranate, and the olive tree--they have not yet borne. FROM THIS DAY ON I WILL BLESS YOU.

Of note is the mention of the grapevine, fig tree, pomegranate and olive tree. The first 3 ripen in August and September, while olives ripen from September to November. The dedication of the House of Restoration on August 1st will mark a shift for those who have given and continue to give towards the house of God.

“CONSIDER, I PRAY YOU, FROM THIS DAY ONWARD (AUGUST 1ST, 2010)… FROM THIS DAY ON, I WILL BLESS YOU.”

The blessing that we have sought, many times in tears will become ours. Our crop will ripen and the wealth of the Nations will come pouring in. In this year of distinction there has been much shaking and sifting, but now the harvest has come. I thank God for the harvest. I receive my harvest and bless the Lord abundantly for his goodness and mercy!

(All these beautiful pics of the Cathedrals of the world can be found on the sacred destinations website http://www.sacred-destinations.com/categories/cathedrals)

Googling vs Talking to God

2010-07-19T09:50:00.003+03:00

I realized yesterday that though I talk to God about my issues I rarely sit with him and dwell on the work of my hands. Yet God has given me many ideas on how to go about handling my business. Sometimes I get frustrated with my work, and instead of sitting down with God and figuring my way out of the drama, I google strategies and plans. I felt really bad about that. So I have decided that on a daily basis, I will take my work, dreams, hopes and struggles before God and ask him to guide me and give me winning strategies for success. I know he will do it and will bless the work of my hands indeed. He is a good God!! If you have been like me, repent with me. God is our preserve and sustenance. How I love him!!

Cry Out For The Blessing

2010-07-16T09:31:00.005+03:00

During my QT this week, my heart has been crying out to God to bless me indeed. I realize that I need the blessing to make life easier for me and to pave the way. Hard work is endorsed by the Bible, but by works shall no man prevail. It must be a combination of the two. I must work hard, but more importantly the blessing must be active in my life.

Jabez exemplifies this truth. He was a hard worker. More honorable than his brothers, but the results were not measuring up to the emotional turmoil or sweat of his brow. So one day he cried out for the blessing. And God honored him.

1 Chronicles 4:8-10

"Jabez was honorable above his brothers; but his mother named him Jabez [sorrow maker], saying, Because I bore him in pain.

Jabez cried to the God of Israel, saying, Oh, that You would bless me and enlarge my border, and that Your hand might be with me, and You would keep me from evil so it might not hurt me! And God granted his request".

Our generation today does not value a blessing mostly because we don't understand its importance. The blessing will break through for you, where you cannot. It will open doors that are tightly shut. The blessing will bring the favor of God on your life. Have you ever wondered why Esau was so bitter with Jacob over the blessing? He understood that without the blessing his life was going to be very difficult. He would have to rely on his own hard work to get himself anything. The ease that comes from the blessing was never going to be his. Check this out:

Jacob: Makes me think of lush rain forest.

Gen 27:27-29

27 So he went to him and kissed him. When Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he blessed him and said,
"Ah, the smell of my son
is like the smell of a field
that the LORD has blessed.

28 May God give you of heaven's dew
and of earth's richness—
an abundance of grain and new wine.

29 May nations serve you
and peoples bow down to you.
Be lord over your brothers,
and may the sons of your mother bow down to you.
May those who curse you be cursed
and those who bless you be blessed."

Esau: Makes me think of Rocky Desert.

Gen 27:39-40

39 His father Isaac answered him,
"Your dwelling will be
away from the earth's richness,
away from the dew of heaven above.

40 You will live by the sword
and you will serve your brother.
But when you grow restless,
you will throw his yoke
from off your neck."

Wouldn't you wail too? Because of the blessing Jacob lived and thrived even through his uncles treachery and came out more abundant than when he had gone into the land of Canaan. It was not the sticks that caused the goats to be striped and speckled. It was the blessing that changed their genetic make up.

Value the blessing and cry out for it like Jabez. Cry out for it like Esau "Bless me—me too, my father!" and God shall grant your request too.

Waka Waka Lessons

2010-07-14T09:49:00.004+03:00

Well, that was a hiatus wasn't it? Been gone a while, but I'm back with lessons from the final game of the world cup. Watching that game I couldn't help but notice how Spain kept playing an aggressive game. They kept possession of the ball knowing that if anything was going to happen, they would have to make it happen. Then I noticed that every chance they had they made an attempt at scoring. You have to take the shot when you see an opening. That's just that. So my lessons with sales and marketing are exactly that:

1) I need to be more aggressive. If I'm going to have any sales, I'm going to have to make them happen.

2) I must take every opportunity I see to make a sale.

I'm working on it. Are you?

Hilluwi - Praise God for the Harvest

2010-06-15T06:07:00.002+03:00

I got the following information from this website: http://www.faithwriters.com/ It spoke to my heart because I have been in a place of great disappointment with God. It seemed as if all my waiting was in vain and that my prayers would go an answered. Today he said to praise him for the harvest. The harvest is in and he is Lord of it. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

HILLUWI

This eighth Hebrew word for praise is further derived from the root origin of Hallal, and to help us fully define its practical functionalities, we shall again freely quote from the contributions of Gerald Rowlands as taken from The Shepherd's Staff:

"... Hilluwi ... is a celebration of thanksgiving for the completion of harvest. Such praise is to be expressed in merriment. A post-harvest scene in any agricultural country would illustrate the essence of this word. The long months of anxious waiting are over. The harvest is safely gathered in. The hard work is finished; the tools are laid down, (and) the crops are safely stored away. It is, (therefore), the time to celebrate the successful completion of the harvest. It is a time of merriment and celebration. Singing and dancing are (usually) the order of the day..."

It is therefore, safe for us to opine that Hilluwi is Harvest Praise. Hilluwi is the kind of effusive and jubilant celebration that accompanies our times of thanksgivings, children dedication services, marriage anniversaries, or the special family thanksgiving services.

During such services, we come to celebrate God's faithfulness to us in the Tabernacle of the Righteous ones, and especially when He must have done something very praise-worthy for us; for example - a long-delayed fruit of the womb; a miraculous deliverance from fatal accidents, fire disasters, or armed-robbery attacks, et cetera. Hilluwi Praise ought to become a part and parcel of our lives as saints, and not just restricted to only agricultural harvests.

Remember Me Oh Lord!

2010-05-15T07:09:00.003+03:00

Many times in this blog I have spoken of my desire to be married and have many Children of my own. At the age of 26 I remember calling my mother and telling her that I felt I was now ready for marriage. 7 years later I am still waiting on the Lord. But I thank God, because 7 is the number of completion. The Lord has used this lack of fulfillment in my life to teach me many things and continues to do so even today.

Reading the Bible I find that a woman's desire for a husband and children is natural. Having one without the other does not satisfy either. I read the story of Leah who even though she was married was an unloved wife. The need for her husbands love and attention made her a miserable woman even though God gave her many children. Her rival Rachel on the other hand was blessed by the love of her husband but her lack of Children made her life miserable. It is clear that one must have both a loving husband and children to feel complete.

The Story of Hannah also puts this into perspective. Here is Hannah, a woman so loved by her husband that he blessed her in double portions. Yet her heart yearned for children of her own. The taunting of her rival did not make things any easier. The Bible says that she poured out her heart before the Lord and asked him to remember her. What does it mean for the Lord to remember you?

In the Bible, the word "Remember" as in when the Lord remembers his people, means to go into action on their behalf. It is not just to recall or to bring to memory. It is to look on their misery and do something to remove it. It is to express concern for that person and to act with loving care for them. When the Lord remembers you, he favors you and meets your need. Hence when he remembered Rachel, she got pregnant and bore Joseph. When he remembered Hannah, she too conceived. He went into action on their behalf in order to meet their need.

May the Lord remember you today. May he meet you at your point of need and shed light and favor where you need it. May he step into your situation and act on your behalf.

Promises of God - Yea and Amen!!

2010-05-06T21:38:00.005+03:00

I have spoken of Isaiah 45 on this blog before, the passage from which I get my calling and purpose from the Lord. To plunder the enemies kingdom of the hidden treasures in secret places. For a while now I have been feeling messed up on the inside. Unfulfilled. I have been seeking God about my purpose and how to accomplish it. One of the things that has been ringing in my spirit for the last few weeks has been the name "Baal Perazim" which means God of the breakthrough. For David said "God has broken my enemies by my hand, like the bursting forth of waters." Now I am beginning to understand.

I have been having great warfare and yesterday was a particularly war filled day, but God broke through for me. During my prayers, I began to call him Baal Perazim over and over again. This morning I woke up and I felt the Lord impress in me that I will need a foundation to Manage the funds he will put in my hand. I have been mulling on a name for it all day. Then just now the Lord said to me that my harvest will come in like the breaking forth of many waters. There shall be much of it and it shall come out fast and furious. It will literally gush forth. I shall be like my mentor Mr. Wahome who woke up a pauper one day and went to sleep worth Ksh. 17 million that night and it has never stopped coming. The phrase "pile up gold as dust" just keeps ringing in my mind. The gold is coming and so is the Silver, I need a foundation to distribute the funds of the Lord to those who need them.

Zechariah 9:3

3And Tyrus did build herself a strong hold, and heaped up silver as the dust, and fine gold as the mire of the streets

If a Pagan King can do it with the help of the devil, how much more I, a child of the Most High God?

Job 22:21-30

21Acquaint now thyself with him, and be at peace: thereby good shall come unto thee.

22Receive, I pray thee, the law from his mouth, and lay up his words in thine heart.

23If thou return to the Almighty, thou shalt be built up, thou shalt put away iniquity far from thy tabernacles.

24Then shalt thou lay up gold as dust, and the gold of Ophir as the stones of the brooks.

25Yea, the Almighty shall be thy defence, and thou shalt have plenty of silver.

26For then shalt thou have thy delight in the Almighty, and shalt lift up thy face unto God.

27Thou shalt make thy prayer unto him, and he shall hear thee, and thou shalt pay thy vows.

28Thou shalt also decree a thing, and it shall be established unto thee: and the light shall shine upon thy ways.

29When men are cast down, then thou shalt say, There is lifting up; and he shall save the humble person.

30He shall deliver the island of the innocent: and it is delivered by the pureness of thine hands.

This word just blessed my heart and I have just now seen it. You know how the word calls them "hidden treasures in secret places?" it is because only the devil knows where they are hidden. But they exist, and no one can find them except the Lord. Therefore in Isaiah 45 he says "I will take you by the hand...I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, he God of Israel, who summons you by name." Only God knows where the treasures are and only he can lead me to them. Now this is the word that blew my mind. It is found in the book of Job 28:7,8,23,24

"There is a path which no fowl knoweth, and which the vulture's eye hath not seen:

The lion's whelps have not trodden it, nor the fierce lion passed by it...

God understandeth the way thereof, and he knoweth the place thereof.

For he looketh to the ends of the earth, and seeth under the whole heaven;"

There is a path to the hidden treasures in secret places. A hidden path that no one and nothing know about. But God understands the way and knows the place where the treasures are. For nothing is hidden from his sight. He looks to the ends of the earth and sees everything under heaven. He shall take my hand and lead me there. That I may pile gold as dust, as mire in the streets for the sake of Israel his beloved. It is so, for it cannot be otherwise. In Jesus Holy and Mighty Name, Amen!

Sow in the Famine! Don't Stop Now!

2010-05-06T20:39:00.003+03:00

I was speaking to a friend of mine a short while ago and he was telling me about how tough things have been for him. As we were talking I mentioned another friend who also was having a really tough time economically. After our conversation, I walked away thinking how crazy it was that when others were going through economic hardship God had preserved me. Then God spoke a word to my heart Daniel 11:32 "...they that know their God shall be strong and do exploits."

The Lord just kept ministering to my heart as I meditated on that word. This is our year of distinction and they that know their God shall continue to flourish in the midst of trouble. As I thought about that word, I began to wonder what that word "know" meant. Many of the people suffering at this time are Christians who I believe know and love God. So what is this knowing? The Lord said to me that knowing him meant not just being saved and reading the word of God, but entering into covenant with him and obeying the terms of the covenant which are laid out in his word.

He caused me to meditate on the last 7 months and how he accelerated my giving. I have never given the way I have done these last seven months. I gave sacrificially and didn't even realize it. I sowed so much seed that the enemy began to come against me. At one point I began to wonder what it was all about. I began to wonder if I had been deceived. The devil would say to me "look around you, what do you have to show for what you earn? You have given it all away." One time when the enemy was working me seriously I asked the Lord why he would not let me save and his answer was, "But you are saving. Where rust and moth do not destroy." That had not been the answer I was looking for, but I entered rest about saving and the peace of God was able to govern within me.

Today the Lord said to me that things will continue to be tough but in the famine I must keep on sowing. Just like Isaac did in Genesis 26. The distinction between the righteous and the wicked will be clear moving forward. Those who are his will be gathered to him and will flourish even in a barren land. The Lord revealed to me that the reason he had me sowing so much was because he knew that a famine was coming and just like in the days of Joseph, he had me store up abundantly during the time of plenty so that I will not feel the famine, and so that I will be a light for those who will suffer from it.

I am reminded of the hymn below known as Bringing In The Sheaves:

Sowing in the morning, sowing seeds of kindness,
Sowing in the noontide and the dewy eve;
Waiting for the harvest, and the time of reaping,
We shall come rejoicing, bringing in the sheaves.

Refrain

Bringing in the sheaves, bringing in the sheaves,
We shall come rejoicing, bringing in the sheaves,
Bringing in the sheaves, bringing in the sheaves,
We shall come rejoicing, bringing in the sheaves,

Sowing in the sunshine, sowing in the shadows,
Fearing neither clouds nor winter’s chilling breeze;
By and by the harvest, and the labor ended,
We shall come rejoicing, bringing in the sheaves.

Refrain

Going forth with weeping, sowing for the Master,
Though the loss sustained our spirit often grieves;
When our weeping’s over, He will bid us welcome,
We shall come rejoicing, bringing in the sheaves.

Refrain

Sowing can be painful, especially when you are broke or when God demands what we think is "just too much!" But one thing I know, that God is faithful to make sure that you reap a harvest if you faint not.

Psalm 126:5-6 says

Those who sow in tears
Shall reap in joy.
He who continually goes forth weeping,
Bearing seed for sowing,
Shall doubtless come again with rejoicing,
Bringing his sheaves with him.

The word says "continually goes forth" you must sow and keep on sowing. No giving up, no stopping, no reducing the amount you sow in fact, if you can, increase it. The word says you shall "doubtless" i.e there is no doubt about it, i.e FO SHO, there is a harvest for you and you shall come rejoicing carrying your harvest singing the Nigerian chorus:

Come and see oh...
Come and see
Come and see what the Lord has done x4

I believe my season for harvest has come. I shall begin to see my harvest and shall sing a new song to the Lord. Many times I have sown in tears, but I will now come back with laughter. Hey! My God has done it for me oh! Come and see!!!!

I AM A SOLUTION

2010-05-04T08:47:00.000+03:00

I am a solution. I was born to solve a problem on earth. I am God’s response to a need that was created on earth. I am an answer to a question that God knew would be asked in my generation. For this reason, I was born. I did not come to this planet to make a living, pay bills and die. I am on an assignment that my generation needs me to complete. I am necessary. I was designed with a seed that the world is waiting for me to develop and is ready for me to deliver.

Quote from Miles Munroe

Have mercy on me NOW!

2010-04-20T10:19:00.003+03:00

I have read the story of blind Bartimaeus before but it has never had this particular effect on me. I noticed that he said "Jesus, you son of David" I wondered why he insisted on calling him son of David until I found out that Son of David is the name that identifies Christ as the Messiah. Bartimaeus had heard the word of God concerning the Messiah in Is 42:6-7

"I the Lord have called You [the Messiah] for a righteous purpose and in righteousness; I will take You by the hand and will keep You; I will give You for a covenant to the people [Israel], for a light to the nations [Gentiles],

To open the eyes of the blind, to bring out prisoners from the dungeon, and those who sit in darkness from the prison."

He was yelling at Jesus saying fulfill the prophecy in my life. And then I saw something else in the amplified that I had never seen before either.

Mark 10:47-52

"And when he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to shout, saying, Jesus, Son of David, have pity and mercy on me [now]!

And many severely censured and reproved him, telling him to keep still, but he kept on shouting out all the more, You Son of David, have pity and mercy on me [now]!

And Jesus stopped and said, Call him. And they called the blind man, telling him, Take courage! Get up! He is calling you.

And throwing off his outer garment, he leaped up and came to Jesus.

And Jesus said to him, What do you want Me to do for you? And the blind man said to Him, Master, let me receive my sight.

And Jesus said to him, Go your way; your faith has healed you. And at once he received his sight and accompanied Jesus on the road".

Now! He told the Lord have mercy on me and implied a Now type of urgency. Have you ever cried out to the Lord and told him to come now! Like he cannot delay anymore and he cannot ignore you? That was Bartimaeus. He was telling the Lord 'you are my Messiah, you are my hope and the hope of all Israel. If you pass me, who shall help me?' He also did not know when Jesus would be passing that way again so he was crying out for a Now miracle. I have been there many times before and I am there now.

Jesus, you son of David, take pity and have mercy on me NOW!

Thitu - My Best Friend

2010-04-13T20:36:00.002+03:00

Thought I would share my best friends story with my readers. She has come from far, but if God did it for her,he can do it for you too. Take heart. Just copy and past this URL:

http://www.harusient.co.ke/thitu.htm

Distinction by the Blood

2010-04-13T10:20:00.001+03:00

On the last day of the great struggle from bondage the Lord told Israel that they had a part to play in their protection. He told them to kill a lamb and to put the blood of the said lamb on the two posts of the door and on the lintel. When the angel of death came in the night, he saw the blood and passed over them. That was on the 14th day of the month. Before that (I would assume on the 13th day of the month which was the day before) all the Israelite women had gone to the Egyptian homes and insisted that they hand over all their gold, silver and fine clothing. They were good and loaded and by this act they had plundered the Egyptians of their wealth.

The distinction was made by the blood of the Lamb as it is this day. The blood of Jesus, our Passover lamb, is the mark of distinction on us his children. Those who have the mark of the Lamb, washed in his blood and saved from sin, are in Goshen and shall enjoy the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Additionally, the Bible says that the wealth of the wicked is piled up for the righteous. It is handover time. What the Egyptians did not know as they stored up articles of silver, gold and fine clothes was that they were purchasing them for an Israelite sister and her family. Even now, it is so.

We are coming out of poverty and struggle and the Lord says “Don’t come out empty!” Ask for the hidden treasures in secret places. They exist. Call them out. Insist on a handover and let the wealth of the Nations come to you. It is interesting that the Lord says come out of the Land of poverty and do not come out empty. He used the country of Zimbabwe in my dream on purpose because even though the people are suffering such extreme poverty, the land itself is rich in metallurgical-grade chromite, coal, asbestos, copper, nickel, gold, platinum and iron ore. There are hidden treasures in secret places, so when you come out, don’t come out empty. Ask for your wealth.

The blood of Jesus is our mark of distinction. In this season, those of the house of the Lord, who have made the Lord their treasure shall rejoice in him and see what they have been waiting for. It is not time to compromise but to hold on in faith. Our season has changed child of God. Place a demand on the season and do what the season demands of you. Note that if the Israelites had chosen to ignore marking their entryways with the blood of the lamb they would have suffered the same fate as the Egyptians. What does this season demand of you? Do it and watch the blood of Jesus mark you for distinction.

Distinction Between Israel and Egypt

2010-04-13T10:16:00.001+03:00

In God there is no favoritism. He does not love one more than the other. However, he is a just and righteous God and has laws that must be followed failure to which there are consequences. Sometimes it has seemed as if those who do not love him or serve him have made more progress and are more blessed. What befalls a sinner also befalls the righteous causing one to sometimes ask “what then is the difference? Why should I stay holy and righteous yet I seem to be faring poorly while sinners are doing so well in the world?” Our God works with times and seasons. There is a time to punish and a time to show mercy. We have been in a time of mercy and grace, but the season has changed. It is now time for God to show out for his Children and let the world know that it pays to serve him.

We are in the year 2010. According to Biblical numerology, twenty is the number for “divide” or “judge” one can then either be accepted or rejected. 10 means to “weigh” or “measure” with the specific purpose of accepting or rejecting. In this year God has been weighing, measuring, dividing and judging so that he can know those who are his and those who are not. Those who are truly his are accepted in the beloved, that is Jesus Christ. And we shall indeed begin to see the distinction in this season between those who are his, and those who are not.

The Lord has done this before. In the book of Exodus when God wanted to change the seasons he walked into Egypt and used a man called Moses to take the wealth of the wicked and hand it over to the righteous. In the beginning when the plagues came they affected both greater Egypt and Goshen but from the 4th plague onwards, the Lord made a distinction. In Biblical numerology, the number 4 speaks of Ruling, Reigning, Kingdom and Dominion. With that fourth plague the Lord began to cause the Israelites to Rule, Reign and have Dominion. He began to establish his Kingdom. It did not look like it, but that is exactly what was happening.

Exodus 8:22-23
22 " 'But on that day I will deal differently with the land of Goshen, where my people live; no swarms of flies will be there, so that you will know that I, the LORD, am in this land. 23 I will make a distinction [a] between my people and your people. This miraculous sign will occur tomorrow.' "

Exodus 9:4
4 But the LORD will make a distinction between the livestock of Israel and that of Egypt, so that no animal belonging to the Israelites will die.' "

Exodus 9:25-26
25 Throughout Egypt hail struck everything in the fields—both men and animals; it beat down everything growing in the fields and stripped every tree. 26 The only place it did not hail was the land of Goshen, where the Israelites were.

Exodus 10:22-23
22 So Moses stretched out his hand toward the sky, and total darkness covered all Egypt for three days. 23 No one could see anyone else or leave his place for three days. Yet all the Israelites had light in the places where they lived.

Exodus 11:6-7
6 There will be loud wailing throughout Egypt—worse than there has ever been or ever will be again. 7 But among the Israelites not a dog will bark at any man or animal.' Then you will know that the LORD makes a distinction between Egypt and Israel.

The demarcation has been made. The Lord is about to begin showing out for his children. Are you for the Lord or against him? If you are for him, then you are accepted in the beloved.

Distinction

2010-04-13T10:14:00.001+03:00

This year my Pastors have set our verse and theme for the year as Distinction. Our Verse comes from Malachi 3:18

“Then you shall again discern between the righteous and the wicked, between one who serves God, and one who does not serve him.”

There shall be a clear demarcation between those who are his and those who are not.
I had dream that I was sitting in a huge passenger plane. We were on the runway awaiting clearance for takeoff from the country of Zimbabwe. If you know anything about the country of Zimbabwe you know that it has become the most impoverished of countries. The currency has become worthless and people queue for miles just to buy some bread. Poverty is what Zim has become known for. Here are some facts on Zimbabwe taken from Wikipedia:

• 94% unemployment and hyperinflation.
• Inflation has surpassed that of all other nations at over 80 sextillion (1021)% (although it is impossible to calculate an accurate value).

• It currently has the lowest GDP real growth rate in an independent country and 3rd in total (behind Palestinian territories.)

• The country has reserves of metallurgical-grade chromite. Other commercial mineral deposits include coal, asbestos, copper, nickel, gold, platinum and iron ore.

• Poverty and unemployment are both endemic in Zimbabwe, driven by the shrinking economy and hyper-inflation.

• As of January 2006, the official poverty line was ZWD 17,200 per month (US$202). However, as of July 2008 this had risen to ZWD 13 Trillion per month (US $41.00)

• Most general labourers are paid under ZWD 200 Billion (US 60c) per month. A nurse's salary in September 2006 was Z$12,542 (12 US cents), less than the cost of a soft drink.

The plane in my dream represented the Church and the passengers were the church members. Those who truly serve the Lord. Not with their mouths only, but wholeheartedly. God was letting me know that the distinction has been made and we were coming out of poverty and struggle (Zimbabwe). We were just waiting for clearance and we would be off. I believe that when we transition from our current Church building to the new one at the end of this month, it will be a prophetic act that will take us out of a land of poverty to a land of prosperity and ownership.

DUMB AS A ROCK

2010-04-01T07:09:00.002+03:00

I am the first girl of three in my family. I have two sisters both of whom are married with children. I love my sisters and we have a great time hanging together. I was saved at an early age. I give thanks for that because salvation has caused me to escape many traps of the enemy. I have been blessed in the past and continue to be blessed even now. God has given me all things that I have asked of him, but in one area he has caused a delay. The area of marriage. In that area the stillness and quietness speaks. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING has happened in that area for a long time.

My youngest sister, 6 years my junior, is legally married but her husband has never completed his traditional marriage requirements. They sent word that they would be coming home to finalize that and we were all happy to hear it, but suddenly I was engulfed by a new emotion where marriage is concerned. Embarrassment. I felt like the girl at the dance who nobody picks because she is either not good looking or is a bit too chubby. Standing at the sidelines hoping against hope that someone would ask her to dance to no avail. Horribly embarrassing!

As usual I took my complaint to God. I don’t understand the delay. I told him that he should not keep me waiting in vain. If there was no man coming then he should let me know so I can stop hoping year after year. I prayed a sincere prayer in this regard and literally gave up the dream of marriage. However, God was very quick to correct me and to let me know that there is a man for me. There is a husband for me as surely as there was an Isaac for Abraham.

Abraham’s wait for a son and the God ordained delay that he experienced encourages me greatly. Abe looked just as dumb as a rock too as he waited on God. Here was a man who when lot was captured, went after him with 318 men of his own household. He owned these men with their women and children. He probably owned about 1000 people, bought and paid for. He had so much wealth that on returning with his plunder he wouldn’t touch any of it but gave it all away lest it be said that it made him rich. He could have taken more wives and concubines, but instead he kept waiting on God for the promise. You see, it’s not just any husband I want. I want the husband of the promise. Just like he did not just want any son, he wanted the son of the promise.

Abraham looked so dumb that his wife decided to assist the poor man. She offered him another woman to impregnate and get a son with. We all know how that do-it-yourself project backfired in her face, yet a son was born. If all God had wanted was a son for Abraham then Ishmael would have been okay. However, when Abe tried to give up the dream of a son with Sarah and begged God to let Ishmael live before him, God said No. Ishmael was Abe’s son, but he was not THE son that God was going to work with on his holy project. He was not the son of the promise.

Many times older, married and more experienced women have pointed out that I am getting older every day. My doctor has brought up the issue of fibroids several times urging me to hurry up and get pregnant if I want to have children at all. My mother has looked at me with that sad look of resignation that only mothers can give. Many others have advised me to say yes to any man that asks me. “There are no perfect men,” they say. They assume that my standards are too high and ask me to bring them down a notch or two. But none of them understand. I have a promise. Just like no son could take Isaac’s place, so no man can take the place of the husband of the promise.

I may be embarrassed by my state right now and look dumb as a rock as I wait for the Lord, but I know that they that wait on the Lord shall not be cut off. In the end, they shall not be ashamed. So the Lord says to me and to all who are experiencing delay like I am:

Isaiah 40:27-31 (Amplified Bible)

27”Why, O Jacob, do you say, and declare, O Israel, My way and my lot are hidden from the Lord, and my right is passed over without regard from my God?

28Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, does not faint or grow weary; there is no searching of His understanding.

29He gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might He increases strength [causing it to multiply and making it to abound].

30Even youths shall faint and be weary, and [selected] young men shall feebly stumble and fall exhausted;

31But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up [close to God] as eagles [mount up to the sun]; they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired.”

Therefore wait and keep on waiting for the Lord. Expect him to do it, look for him in the midst of the stillness and continue to hope in him. In that stillness, when nothing seems to be happening you will hear the still, small voice. Just like Elijah did. Whatever he tells you to do, do it and be eternally blessed.

Changing Seasons

2010-03-30T09:53:00.000+03:00

Isaiah 45:1-6 is my word. My personal word from the Lord. It is the word that lets me know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I was created for greatness. This phase of my life has now began. I have entered into a new season. My season of greatness. When seasons change, most of the time it is quietly. Without much ado. But then we begin to see the subtle differences and then gradually it becomes evident that things have changed. My season has changed. Previously Isaiah 45:1-6 was a promise. I have began to live it out. I will never forget the Passover season of 2010. The season I began to walk in the reality of the promise.

The Lord has summoned me by name and called me to fulfill my destiny. He has called me to give me a title of honor. To give me the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places. Today he has taken hold of my hand to subdue nations before me. To unarm and ungird the loins of kings to open doors before me, so that gates will not be shut. Jehovah himself goes before me to level every mountain. To break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron.

The Lord will strengthen me all for the glory of his name and that I may serve his children. It is all for their benefit and his glory. I cannot explain what is going on within me right now. I just know that I will never be the same again. Never again!

Celebrate the passover

2010-03-29T16:45:00.003+03:00

This is an excerpt from Elijah list. You can find the full article here http://www.elijahlist.com/words/display_word/8617

The Timetable of Passover

It's interesting to compare the timetable of Jesus' crucifixion with the Passover celebration. According to the Torah, at the time of Passover a number of events had to take place in a specific order, and at very specific times.

1. The Passover Lamb had to be selected on a specific day. Exodus 12 instructs that the Passover lamb be chosen on the 10th day of 1st month. By the time of Jesus, only lambs from Bethlehem were considered eligible to serve as Passover lambs. So the lamb born in Bethlehem was chosen and brought into Jerusalem from the east (down the Mount of Olives) and entered the city through the sheep gate. On the 10th day of 1st month Jesus, the Lamb born in Bethlehem, came down the Mount of Olives and entered Jerusalem through the sheep gate. (This is called His "triumphal entry.") As He entered, the people waved palm branches and shouted "Blessed is he that comes in the name of the LORD! Save us, Son of David!" By mass acclamation Jesus is designated as Israel's Messiah! The crowds had chosen their Passover Lamb!

2. The Lamb then had to be examined. The Torah instructed that once the lamb was chosen, it had to be carefully examined for blemishes. Only a perfect, spotless and unblemished lamb would suffice for the Passover. After arriving in Jerusalem, Jesus went to the Temple to teach. While there, He was approached by the Pharisees, Sadducees, Herodians and the teachers of the Law. Each group posed difficult questions, trying to trap him. Essentially, they were looking for any blemish which might disqualify Him as Messiah. But no one could find fault with Him. He was without blemish.

3. The Leaven (impurity) must be cast out. Torah instructs that before the feast, all leaven (impurity) must be cast out of every Israelite home. Each mother took a candle and searched out impurity, removing it from her house. This regulation is still observed today. Passover is a time to cleanse every house. Every observant Jewish family carefully cleans their house before Passover. Every trace of impurity is removed. After Jesus arrived in Jerusalem, He entered the Temple and cast out the moneychangers. He was following the Biblical instruction to prepare for Passover by cleansing His Father's house.

4. The Lamb is taken to the altar for public display. On the morning of the 14th day of the 1st month, when all has been set in order, the lamb was led out to the altar. At 9 a.m. that morning, the lamb was bound to the altar and put on public display for all to see. On the morning of the 14th day of the 1st month, when all had been fulfilled, Jesus was led out to Calvary. At 9 a.m. that morning, just as the lamb was being bound to the altar, Jesus was nailed to the Cross and put on public display at Calvary.

5. The Lamb was slain at a specific time. At exactly 3 p.m. the high priest ascended the altar. As another priest blew a shofar on the temple wall, the high priest cuts the throat of the sacrificial Lamb, and declared, "IT IS FINISHED!" At 3 p.m. on that high holy day, at the moment the Passover lamb was killed, Jesus cried with a loud voice, "IT IS FINISHED," and gave up His spirit. In Greek, "It is finished" is tetelistai! It means, "The debt has been paid in full!"